Friday, September 18, 2009

Parenthood: Day 2

So, unsurprisingly, the last 28 hours have flown by in a blur. After the birth, we had to play the waiting game for a while. Apparently there are a lot of other babies in Evanston that share Anabelle's birthday (or the preceding couple days) because there were no recovery rooms available to us right away. Probably the biggest issue with this was that in the labor and delivery rooms there are no sleeping apparatuses for people other than the mother, and at that point I had been up for about 30 hours straight. So when Christy took a nap at 1:30 while Anabelle was up in the nursery getting her first bath I left Christy's mom to watch over her and headed home to get a few hours sleep (another big benefit to living 2 blocks away from the hospital). Never have 2 hours of sleep passed so quickly or felt so good.


By the time I got back to the hospital Christy had been moved to our recovery room and Anabelle had joined us again. That's pretty much where we've bee since, doing our best to please Miss Anabelle and keep her happy when she's awake and comfortable when she's asleep. We all tried to go to sleep at around 9:30 with varying degrees of success. At about 11:00 Anabelle started fussing so mommy fed her and she went back to sleep. Then at 12:30 the nursery came and took her away to get her Hepatitis immunization shot. At 4:30 she woke up again and after mom fed her it was dad's turn to get her to go back to sleep. Then at around 8:30 we all woke up for the day.

Since then it's been a bit of a circus here. Our pediatrician, Dr. Bernstein (who goes by Dr. Andy) came by and took a look at her at 9:30 and said that everything looks good and she is definitely on track to go home tomorrow. At about 9:30 she started to get cranky and we were joking that it was because she had just turned 1 day old and was depressed about how old she's getting. Between 10 and 11 we had visits from the food service people with our breakfast, the on-duty nurse to check on Christy and the baby, one housekeeper to attend to the trash and a different housekeeper to change the linens, and Christy's doctor. Finally, a lactation consultant came by to help Christy with breastfeeding and just left a few minutes ago. In between all that I also got to change my first of many, many diapers. Now we are just awaiting a circus of a different sort as various friends and family stop by to visit.

Tomorrow my mom is flying in from Texas so it will be nice to have an extra set of hands around the house to help out during the first week and I'm so glad she was able to make it up to visit her new granddaughter!

Think that's all for now. Here's a few more pictures from Anabelle's first day of life!





Thursday, September 17, 2009

Baby Time!

Update #2: And she's here! After 51 minutes of pushing she arrived screaming her little head off at 9:06 A.M. She's quite a horse at 8 pounds, 11 oz. Mama and baby are currently getting to know one another. Here's the first of many, many pictures:


Update #1: As of 5:30 she is 7 cm dilated on her way up to 10 at ~1 cm per hour. Once she gets there, they tell us that we can expect between 1 and 3 hours of pushing till we're done. Do the math and it means a baby by noon and maybe as early as 10.

It's currently 4:41 A.M. and we're in the labor and delivery room at Evanston Hospital awaiting Anabelle's arrival. I was finishing up playing some online poker (where, shockingly enough, I actually won some money) and heading off to bed at a little before 12:30 when Christy came out of the bathroom and said "I'm not sure, but I think my water might have just broken." Unsure of what to do with this uncertain information, I just said "well, lay back down and try to sleep. If it's something, then we'll know soon enough and if it's nothing well then I guess we'll know that soon too." Not more than 4 minutes later she sat up and said "yep; that was definitely my water." Before I could even get her a towel from the linen closet she'd already had her first *real* contraction and immediately knew that they were different from the preparation ones she'd been feeling over the last couple weeks. So we got up and immediately started making all the last minute preparations. The contractions started coming every 4-5 minutes and after about a half hour we called the doctor to see if we should head over to the hospital. He said that we should so at about 1:30 we did just that.

After getting relatively settled and a few more contractions any lingering doubts Christy had about getting an epidural went out the window. They administered it to her at around 3:00 and since then she has been resting comfortably. She can still feel her legs and move them around but all the pain from the contractions are gone. It's funny because she can watch the little monitor and see the point where the contraction is at its peak and used to cause her absolutely excruciating pain but now she might as well be watching a video game.

She has been advised to try to get some sleep if she can and given that I got to lay down for a whopping 4 minutes so far tonight (I know, poor me) I am going to try and do the same. My completely non-medical opinion predicts that we'll have a daughter at 10:04 this morning. So far everything is going smoothly and everyone at the hospital, especially our nurse Amy, has been wonderful. I'll update more when I have a chance.


This is the monitor Christy is hooked up to. The upper left number is Anabelle's heart rate. It fluctuates between about 130 and 155. The upper right number measures the contractions. When it hits about 30, the contraction is starting (so you can see that she was in the middle of one when we took this). The highest number we've seen so far has been 118. Not sure how high they go.



This is the actual machine that does the monitoring. The monitor from the picture before is really just the screen on the left blown up. The paper on the right tracks the heartbeat and contractions so the doctors can see what is happening over time.

Have no idea what this is. Possibly the machine that goes "Bing!"


Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Relatively Quick Hits

First of all, still no baby. We've got an appointment set up for Friday to induce if she doesn't come before then, so at least there's an end in sight. We're still hoping that she comes on her own in the next 48 hours though. Since we've started telling people about the Friday plan, it seems as though everyone has an opinion on inducement. Let me put this as delicately as I can. Your opinion is valid, but we don't wish to hear it.

Today Max Baucus unveiled a summary of his health care bill. It's the most moderate of the current bills and carries with it an estimated price tag of $856 billion over the next ten years. It has no "public option" but would create insurance exchanges and bar insurers from dropping policyholders in the event of illness or from excluding people on the basis of pre-existing conditions. It specifically addresses that it will not provide coverage to illegal immigrants and no federal dollars will be used for abortions (though there are a couple caveats to this that will surely be more than enough ammo for the extremists to continue to rage). I'll reserve final judgment until the complete bill is released and analysed but my initial impression is that it addresses most of what Obama wanted and represents a step in the right direction. I'm firmly convinced that if a bill is to be passed this year that this will be the one. The more progressive bills from the House just don't have a chance in the Senate.

Tangentially related, former President Carter has made some comments indicating that he believes racism played a part in Rep Wilson's outburst-heard-round-the-world last week. While I don't necessarily disagree with him, I think it's counterproductive to talk about it right now. Playing the race card in any form just causes people to dig in their heels. It's not conducive to reconciliation. That comment, like the original outburst itself, just serves as a distraction which quickly dominates the debate. Suddenly we're talking about race relations in America. That's a worthy topic but not one that has any place in a health care debate, and it's going to take immense focus to get something done in the next couple months.

Finally, I've been following the debacle that has been the Afghanistan elections and I'm beginning to think along the same lines as George Will. It might be time to start packing it in. I understand that if we leave the Taliban will just set up shop again and it will once again become a training ground for terrorists. I'm starting to think that's the "better" of our options though. Mainly, I just don't think anyone has the stomach to do what really needs to be done: a probable decade-long commitment from an international force totalling half a million or more troops. After our surge, we'll have a total of 65,000 troops there. That may sound like a lot (and it is) but think about it this way: the football stadium in Champaign holds 70,000 people. Do you really think a football-stadium worth of troops can control a country the size of Texas? And these "elections" have proven to basically be the final straw with me. It's obvious that those in power have no desire to establish a flourishing democracy; they (like all bad leaders) just want to cling to power. So now we are spilling our blood and spending our money to support an illegitimate government while achieving little more than forcing the Taliban and the terrorists to move their camps across the border into Pakistan. I just don't know what we're actually accomplishing anymore.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Bears Hangover

If you have absolutely no interest in Bears football, you'll probably just want to skip this post.

So in the matter of about 4 hours Jay Cutler went from Bears savior to pariah. It will be interesting to see what kind of a reception he gets next week during his first home game. My prediction is that he'll get cheered but god help him if he doesn't get off to a good start or throws an early pick. As bad as his performance was (and it was pretty bad), I'd urge my fellow Bears fans not to overreact. It's still just one game. Not that I'm comparing the two, but Favre once threw 6 INTs in a playoff game, and also threw 5 in a regular season game. The point being that even the great QBs can look absolutely terrible on occasion. It's actually a good thing that the 4 INTs were a career high; it would be much worse if he'd already done that 3-4 times. Still, the wrap on Cutler was that he can't win a big game and folds in pressure situations and this certainly didn't do him any favors in that regard.

If you break down the 4 picks, one was an absolutely atrocious throw (the first one), one was actually a sensational defensive play (the 2nd one), and the other two (while still absolutely Cutler's fault) had as much to do with the receiver and the QB not being on the same page as the throw itself. For the 3rd pick, Cutler is scrambling and he sees Knox cutting across the middle but then almost simultaneously as Cutler releases the ball Knox abruptly cuts back. As a receiver, that's what you're supposed to do. When you see your QB out of the pocket, you run to that side of the field so that he doesn't have to throw across the field away from his momentum. But Knox worked mainly with the 2nd and 3rd team during preseason, so Cutler and him likely don't have a good rapport yet but that should change (and hopefully soon). Finally, on the last pick (although again an ill-advised throw) Knox really needs to help his QB out and doesn't. It's a quick out route towards the sidelines and Cutler throws it to where both his receiver and the corner are (which is why it was ill-advised; there was no separation). Both the receiver and defender turn and see the ball coming, but rather than come to the ball Knox inexplicably decides to move backwards and gives Al Harris an easy pick. If he makes a move towards the ball, 8 times out of ten they both fight for it and it drops incomplete.

As for positives from the game, the defense (apart from one Nathan Vasher slip) actually played spectacularly. Although you rarely say that about a game where the D gives up 21 points, considering the 4 turnovers (which doesn't even include the idiotic "fake" punt) it really was. Of course, as I sit here and write this it looks like Urlacher is now done for the season and 2 other defenders went down with injuries, so it could be that this is the best effort we'll get from the Bears D the whole year. If so, it's a shame to waste it.

In the end, this doesn't change my season win prediction. In reviewing the schedule, I already had this game marked down as an L when I came up with the 11-5 mark. That still doesn't stop me from being disappointed about yesterday (and force me to repeat my mantra: it's not THAT they lose, it's HOW they lose). I also have them losing this week at home to the Steelers, before winning 7 of their next 8. This is how I see the rest of the season:

Pitt L
@ Seattle W
Detroit W
@ Atlanta L
@ Cinncy W
Cleveland W
Arizona W
@ San Fran W
Philadelphia W
@ Minnesota L
St. Louis W
Green Bay W
@ Baltimore L
Minnesota W
@ Detroit W

That's 7-1 at home this year, and 4-4 on the road. I still think that's doable. Assuming, of course, that we are spared any more Rex Grossman impersonations from Mr. Cutler.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Still the Proud Parents of a Fetus

So, as of about 13 hours ago Miss Anabelle is officially late and her parents (and especially her mother) are not too pleased about it. Actually, it turned out to be a blessing that she didn't come yesterday. For some unknown reason (possibly Jimmy John's poisoning) I suddenly got extremely sick yesterday afternoon around 1:00. I spent the next 3 hours in bed with the shakes and then started feeling extremely hot and got a splitting headache. All I could think about was "please don't let Christy go into labor right now." Luckily she didn't and, happily, though I am still not 100% I am feeling much better today. So now Anabelle is once again welcome to come at any time now (though I wouldn't be terribly upset if she waited till after the Bears game tonight).

Christy and I walked into downtown Evanston on Friday night, had dinner a really good BBQ joint, and then went and saw a movie (Extract). As you can probably see by my review to the right, I didn't think too much of it. Definitely my least favorite of Mike Judges' movies (the best of course being Office Space, then Idiocracy, and even Beavis and Butthead Do America was better). It's not that the film was terrible; it's more that there weren't any truly hysterical parts and none of the characters were all that likeable. Still, at this point we have to treat every night out as potentially our last for a while so it was still a good time.

Today I am just trying to rest up and get ready to watch the Bears tonight (pending fetal escape plans)! Call it Cutler fever, but I am actually quite optimistic about the Bears this year. Their early schedule is pretty tough, but I'm predicting 11-5 and a 1st round bye in the playoffs.

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

Slacking Again

So I didn't really intend to not post anything for 2 and a half weeks. Ironically, it's not for lack of anything to say. I actually have a whole bunch that I want to write about but haven't found the time. Well, that's not quite true. I haven't found the time to do it while I've been at work, and I'm not accustomed to blogging on my own time. For once I find myself working pretty much from the time I get to work all the way till I leave (a truly novel approach, I know). And not because I have tons and tons of work to do; it's just that from now on every day when I leave I have to think that I might not be coming in for the next 4-5 days so I am trying to get as much done as possible so I don't fall too far behind when Anabelle finally comes.

Speaking of Anabelle, she continues to make us wait. The first week of September came and went, thus proving me wrong (not for the first and surely not for the last time). Christy had a doctor's appointment today and she told us (for the second week in a row) that she could go into labor at any point now. She also told us that Christy is 4cms dillated and almost 100% effaced. For those uninitiated with that terminology . . .um, google it. But just to give a frame of reference, if you are in the hospital and in labor they won't allow you to get an epidural until you are at 4cm, so it's usually an indicator that you're pretty far along in the process.

As you can imagine this past weekend was rather uneventful, as we pretty much just sat around waiting for a baby that decided she's not ready to come out yet. It was nice to have one last relaxing 3-day weekend but the trouble was we couldn't ever fully relax knowing that at any moment we might have to spring into action. So instead I geeked out and played about 20 hours of Final Fantasy III and watched a lot of mediocre movies as well as the entire first season of 30 Rock.

OK, I'm just getting set to watch Obama's speech to Congress. I'm hoping to have a blog on that as well as a couple of other random topics in the next couple days.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Getting Close . . .

Anabelle's due date is exactly 3 weeks from tomorrow. That means that tomorrow she will be officially at 37 weeks and thus considered to be at full term. That means that from this point on it could pretty much be at any time. We went to the doctor on Wednesday and she's actually a little ahead of schedule but of course they don't push up the due date or anything because they don't want you blaming them when it doesn't happen. Personally, I just have this feeling that she's going to come the first week of September and be a few days early. But of course if my "feelings" were always correct my Vegas experiences would be a lot different so who knows.

We had the joy of attending Lamaze class all last weekend. And I mean ALL weekend; 9-4 on Saturday and 9-2 on Sunday. Actually, while not the most exciting of experiences I found it to be a lot more worthwhile than I expected and I'm glad that we went. It's funny because going into the class you think of giving birth as the most painful,traumatic experience in the world but then the way they talk about it and explain it with the various models/videos/diagrams it makes it seem like it's this really easy process that basically takes care of itself. So it's like going from one extreme to the other. Christy is still pretty positive that she's going to get the epidural but she's going to try to go up till that point without pain medication. We'll see how that works out. All in all though I've never been more glad to be a guy and not have to worry about going through this. I think that the most surprising thing about the whole class was that I thought that it would be at some point during it that everything would "hit me" and I'd start freaking out about how close it all was to happening. But it actually was just the opposite. I ended up being far more reassured because now I know the logistics of where I need to go to drop her off, where we'll be staying before she has the baby and after and what's going to happen to Anabelle between birth and when we leave. Of course, I'm sure there will still be plenty of opportunity for freaking out.

As you may be able to tell from looking to the right of this post, this week has been dominated by movies ('cause the Cubs certainly haven't given me any reason to follow them dilligently). In general, the 2 movies I saw in the theatre were excellent and the two on DVD . . . not so much. For sure anyone that likes sci-fi at all needs to see District 9 immediately and all Tarantino fans will enjoy Inglorious Basterds. I had heard very bipolar things about The Reader: people seemed to either love it or hate it and now after seeing it I can see why (of course, after saying that I gave it a firmly middle rating). Without giving too much away, there's a plot device that the whole movie hinges on which some people will just accept and other people will think is just horribly, horribly stupid. You can put me closer to the latter category. Other than that it is well written and acted, and it certainly wasn't boring, but I just don't think it had any business being anywhere near the Best Picture category. And Winslet's performance, while solid, wasn't really Oscar-worthy either in my opinion. Meryl Streep gave a much better performance in Doubt, but I think the Academy just expects great performances from her so it doesn't get the attention it should. Finally, there's not a lot to say about Rachel Getting Married. I struggled with how exactly to rate it because . . .well, the best way I can describe it is that this movie was not meant for me. If you love you some melodrama and the idea of basically being a fly on the wall during the wedding weekend of a fairly dysfunctional family appeals to you, then by all means see it. Probably the best way I can sum it up is that it's probably a 4-Star movie that I had a 1-Star reaction to; hence the 2.5 Stars.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

What the Health?!?!

So, even though we still don't have just one official health care reform bill (we have 6) I'm ready to weigh in a little bit with some of my thoughts.

Above all, as per usual I have to express my extreme disapointment at how quickly the quality of the discourse has deteriorated on this issue. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, but I am a little bit. A year ago it seemed like it was generally acknowledged that health care reform was needed and almost everyone I spoke with seemed fully capable of discussing it in a rational manner. Even at my work meetings at BCBS the consensus among the VPs was "something is going to happen and it needs to happen, because the status quo is going to quickly get out of hand."

Now, somehow over the course of the last year we've gone from that to a bunch of people being convinced that a government-run health care plan is basically a harbinger of the apocalypse.

Look, there are plenty of reasons to be against a government plan. There's a lot of valid points to be made. In general, the government doesn't do as efficient a job as the private sector in most industries. You practically cannot throw a stone without hitting a government-run bureauacracy that's rife with either corruption or crippling inefficiency (or a healthy blend of both). What's completely not valid, however, are the outlandish accusations of "death panels" and comparisons between Obama and the Democratic majority to Hitler and Nazi Germany. These are baseless fear-mongering attacks used as justification by people who already hate Obama and the Democratic party and are looking for any thinly-veiled excuse to try and legitimize their feelings in their own mind and the mind of other easily-led individuals.

This whole death panel furor (not to be confused with Fuhrer) began with a seemingly inocuous amendment in the House bill which would allow Medicare to provide for voluntary counseling on end-of-life decisions (i.e. living wills, learning about hospice, making a family member a health proxy). How this has been distorted into people claiming that the elderly would be subjected to mandatory reviews in front of government bureaucrats who would then determine if they should live or die is almost beyond me. This is not a leap in logic; it's an interstellar voyage to another plane of reality. Guess what? I'm willing to bet that 90% of you out their with a private insurance plan are currently covered for end-of-life counseling. And although I haven't been to every room in my building, I'm pretty sure that I would have noticed any signs that said "Death Panel Tribunal" or "The Killing Floor" around here.

Perhaps the most amusing of the criticisms came from the Investor's Business Daily who, in comparing the Democratic plan to Britain's current health care, said "People such as scientist Stephen Hawking wouldn't have a chance in the UK, where the National Health Service would say the life of this brilliant man, because of his physical handicaps, is essentially worthless." Duly informed that scientist Stephen Hawking is both British and living, they then amended the article. Stephen Hawking's response: "I wouldn’t be here today if it were not for the NHS. I have received a large amount of high-quality treatment without which I would not have survived." You know, you'd like to think that even the most pedestrian of journalists would do a real quick fact check just to make sure that one of your main points does not in fact completely contradict your entire premise.

Alright, while since I've ragged on the right-wing attacks of the health care bill I'll switch gears and take aim at the Democratic party. My question to them is this: why are they so petrified of public opinion on this issue? It seems to me that they're spending way too much time trying to deflect all the ridiculous and outlandish criticism. There is still 15 months to go before the next election, so it would seem that by the time it rolls around you're going to be judged by the results of the bill you pass and not on the debate that surrounds it now. As such, it seems like the most prudent option is to spend as much time as you can on crafting the best possible bill. Let the Republicans and other nuts say as many crazy and ridiculous things as they want to; in fact the crazier the better. When legislation passes and none of their apocalyptic scenarios come to pass it will just serve as another hit to their credibility. But if you sit there and worry about every opinion poll and detrimentally alter the bill to fit the popular mood of the hour, you've got a good chance of ending up with a spectacularly crappy bill. And that's what'll get you killed in the election next year.

But back to the Republicans (sorry). Again I lament the lack of a viable, rational opposition. By the Republican ideals that I grew up with, they should be against government health care for two reasons: 1) the cost, and 2) the private sector is more efficient. We would be far better served as a nation if they stuck to those points of contention instead of branching off into some of these ridiculous tangents. I absolutely do not like the idea of unchecked power. I believe that the goal of an opposition party is to compromise so that they get as many of their ideas as possible represented in legislation while they are the minority party. Simply fighting everything tooth and nail doesn't serve anyone. If a bill is bad; make it less bad and then support it. Then you can go back and tell your constituency "this is a horrible bill, but at least I was able to get this silver lining in it." Otherwise, simply refusing to support an opposition bill under any circumstances just removes and incentive for the majority party to work with you at all. As long as they can keep their party together, you're obsolete.

One final note, and yes it's another shot at Republicans. Above all, the thing that kills me about this party is the hypocrisy. They don't govern according to the things they claim to believe in. They are unwavering in their support for the Constitution when it comes to the 2nd amendment, yet when it comes to immigration they like to conveniently overlook the 14th amendment ("All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States"). Everytime any politician proposes the idea of raising the tax rates on any group, "that's socialism!" is the rallying cry. But I don't hear any of them making the proposal to move to a flat tax or abolish income tax altogether. Finally, and as it relates to health care, it seems to me that if you're going to take the position that the government is an inferior insurer to the private sector that you ought to be proposing an abolishment of all existing government health insurance. That means no more Medicare and no more city or state supported health insurance either. If the private sector is so much better, then let the government buy their employee's insurance from them.

All of this hit home for me this week. On Monday rumors began swirling that Blue Cross was going to be laying off a substantial number of employees sometime soon. Well yesterday the shoe dropped and 650 employees were let go. Fortunately, I was not one of them. But as I was thinking on Monday about the possibility, I realized that even if I got laid off and couldn't find another job, although it would be tough, we would be OK. Even if we got foreclosed on and had to beg family to take us in, I think that we could get by. Well, in every respect but one: our health care would be gone. And what if the worst happened and Anabelle needed some very expensive surgeries in her first couple years of life. What are we going to do? Not getting it done will not be an option. And the worst part is that there's nothing I can do right now to better prepare myself. No job = no health insurance; it's that simple right now. This actually has nothing to do with government vs. private insurance; I just think the whole tie-in between your health insurance and your employer is sheer lunacy. Whether it's a government-run plan or just my employer giving me the equivalent of what they pay on my behalf so I can go out and get my own coverage, either one is better than what we have now. And that realization that doing almost anything is better than doing nothing is a perspective that deserves more prominence in this ongoing debate.

Monday, August 03, 2009

A Picture's Worth . . .Well at Least a Caption

Just a few pictures I've taken with my G1 over the last couple weeks which have struck me as humorous.

First up, from the basement of our condo I present you with possibly the world's most useless sign:

Apparently it is designed for the .01% of the population who knows how to read but doesn't know what a fire extinguisher looks like. I also have to wonder if the arrow is at all necessary.

Next up, I took this one at IKEA this weekend. Apparently they do not have a very high opinion of the quality of their merchandise (those are rugs BTW):


And finally, I'd like to present you with what I like to call "The Ultimate in Short-Term Solutions":


Guaranteed to completely solve your problem for upwards of 30-45 seconds!

In other news, I finally saw The Watchmen this past weekend. Overall after watching it I became convinced that the graphic novel must be pretty good but I think there were just some things that didn't translate very well into film. Still, it was entertaining and I'm glad I saw it. For once I thought that the "twist" at the end was actually pretty decent, which is a rarity in super-hero movies.

This weekend we are seeing a play on Friday night (a new play called Spring Awakening) and then heading up to the Wisconsin State Fair on Saturday to get our annual cream-puff fix, take in some pig races, watching a mooing contest, and undoubtedly spend a bunch of money on some useless crap at the expo. Might be the last "normal" outing we get to do before baby-time.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Decelarating

So not too much new going on. That's actually a good thing, since we've been pretty busy since early May. This weekend we've got a Cubs game (possibly our last of the year) and then just relaxing on the agenda. Not too bad.

Christy and I went to the Elton John/Billy Joel concert on Tuesday. Overall it was OK, but I just was not in the right mood for it. I was still tired from the weekend and really would have rather just gone home, watched the Cubs game, and went to bed early. I have been trying to be healthier of late and decided not to drink. I find that I can enjoy a concert sober only if I am really, really into the music and that's only true of a handful of artists for me at this point. And of course with that in mind this concert decided to be the longest one I have ever attended - over 3 and a half hours. Good for getting your money's worth but bad when you're looking at the setlist online and just counting down till it's over. But we mainly went for Christy and she seemed to have a good time so that's all that matters. I have seen Billy Joel before and would see him again but I most definitely will not be going to any future Elton John concerts. Musically, he was fine but man he is just not exciting at all. He's sitting for every song. Obviously he has to do that since he's playing the piano, but it doesn't make it any more exciting for the audience. Then after each song he would stand up, wave his arms a little bit, clap for himself, then sit back down. Repeat. No banter with the crowd at all. By comparison, Billy Joel had the energy of a teenager.

I've been following the health care debate pretty closely. Being a Blue Cross employee, obviously it will affect me more than just about anyone else other than the people currently uninsured that will get insurance. I'm going to refrain from going in depth on it right now because it's still such a work in progress. Suffice to say that on one hand I'm very glad that it's being pushed off till the fall because it still needs a lot of work, and on the other hand I'd be a lot happier to see Republicans take a more constructive approach to the debate instead of continuing to play the socialist card again and again and again.

The only other interesting thing I came upon is a story about the CIA and LSD tests. My brother turned me on to the "Stuff You Should Know" podcasts from howstuffworks.com and one of them was on the CIA's testing of LSD on unsuspecting Americans in the 50s and 60s. This story would seem to be the stuff of conspiracy theories but thanks to the Freedom of Information Act it's now all been verified. I'd advise you to either read the article or listen to the podcast the next time you have 20 minutes free. Frankly (as mentioned in the podcast) I'm absolutely stunned they haven't made a Hollywood biopic about George White (one of the main ringleaders). Of particular interest is that the second stage of their experiments occurred in San Francisco and was one of the main contributing factors to the birth of the counter-culture revolution there.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Moving On

So, a quick scorecard for the last couple posts:

Post (largely) on a book about the Iraq War - 1 comment (unrelated to Iraq)
Post on retirement - 1 comment
Post on Michael Jackson - 21 comments

Seems about right. I'll have to remind myself of this the next time I find myself complaining that Hollywood makes too many mainstream popcorn movies. Does my writing completely suck or do you guys really not have any opinions on these things? Or has Weir become my sole readership? That's a distinct possibility. Weir, maybe I should just start e-mailing you directly. Although, ironically, your commenting frequency is better than your e-mail response rate.

Moving on . . .

I got the quarterly results of my 401(k) in the mail the other day and was astonished to see that it actually made money! Wow, who knew that they could do that?

Moving on . . .

So tomorrow is Christy's shower at our place and I will be . . . elsewhere. I had orginally planned to go out of town somewhere but seeing as we have traveled 3 of the last 4 weekends that doesn't seem too appealing to me any more. So instead I'm going to be hibernating at the movie theatre in downtown Evanston. As of right now I'm planning to see 3 movies: The Hurt Locker, Harry Potter, and Transformers 2. I look at that list and immediately think about the law of diminishing returns.

Moving on . . .

We finally got a Wii and I've been doing the Wii Fit for about a week now. Overall I like it but it is definitely a blow to the ego the first time you step on and a high-pitched, chirpy little voice cheerfully informs you "that's overweight" as your on-screen representation balloons in the mid-section. I really like the Yoga stuff even though it massively exposes how horribly inflexible I am. But I was never gonna go to a class on my own so I suppose this is the only way it was ever going to happen. I also just got Punch-Out last night and it is everything I thought it could be and more. Call me crazy but I've always thought that Punch-Out would make a great movie. Certainly it would have to be campy and cartoony (I'm thinking something in the vein of Hellboy 2) but can you tell me that Soda Popinski, Bald Bull, and Super Macho Man wouldn't make great characters? 10 years ago Matt LeBlanc would have been a good Mac; not sure who would play him now. Forrest Whitaker would definitely have to play Doc.

As we head into the weekend, I think we've gone 10 days now without a celebrity death. Let's hope that streak is still alive come Monday. Also, I'm thinking of doing another roundtable, so either comment or send me an e-mail if you'd like to be a part of it. Better yet, regardless of whether or not you'd like to participate in it I'd love to get some ideas for questions so that I don't have to come up with them all myself and force people to write about things that no one cares about. I'll still be the one selecting the question (this is still a blogtatorship) but I think it'll be more interesting that way.

Have a good weekend everyone!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Happy Non-Sports Day!

As we sit here the day after the MLB All-Star game, we are in the midst of the only day in the entire calendar year with no televised event from any of the four major pro sports leagues (MLB, NFL, NBA, and NHL). That means that today is a particularly difficult today for husbands across the U.S. to get out of doing the umpteen number of projects around the house they've been promising their wives they would do this last year or so, and bachelors will need to find some other thinly-veiled excuse to drink on a Wednesday. I will be "celebrating" by going to Home Depot (to get what will hopefully be the last supplies to put the finishing touches on the nursery) and Sam's Club (to get supplies for Christy's baby shower on Saturday). Seems pretty fitting.

I saw this article on Yahoo the other day. You don't really need to click on the link (not that you were going to anyway). The title is "Swearing Makes Pain More Tolerable" but in a Freudian slip moment I initially read it as "Swearing Makes Palin More Tolerable." Indeed it does . . .

Last week saw the passing of Robert McNamara (former Secretary of State) at the age of 93. Few people took a break from the Michael Jackson coverage to notice. I'd just like to take this opportunity to recommend (again) that everyone see the 2003 McNamara documentary The Fog of War about the lessons learned from Vietnam. It is an absolutely fascinating film and gives you some great insight into how things that seemed so certain at the time turned out to be dead wrong. There are obvious parallels to the Iraq War (and really just about any war) and it makes you wonder if 20 years from now we'll be seeing anyone from the Bush administration being as forthright as McNamara is here. Regardless what you think of him, he is definitely worth listening to.

Speaking of passings that no one noticed, how about poor Bill Mays? My brother gets the award for funniest joke in bad taste that I've heard this year. Written to me via e-mail: "Ed, Michael, and Farrah; it always comes in 3s. But wait! Billy Mays will throw in one for free! Only if you act RIGHT NOW."

Anyone who might be keeping tabs on my movie and book lists on the right may have noticed that I finally finished another book: The Gamble by Thomas Ricks. It's only the 2nd book I've finished this year, which is way down from my average of 1/month the last couple years. I blame 1) my obsession with playing Donkey Kong on the el; 2) my Kindle New York Times subscription; and 3) my Economist subscription. In any case, The Gamble is a "sequel" to his 2006 book Fiasco. That book covered the events of the Iraq War from 2003-2005 while the new one covers 2006-2008. The first question most people ask about the books is "Are they partisan?" In my opinion I don't think that they are. Sure, Fiasco was extremely critical about the handling of the war and that was controversial in 2006 but at this point you'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who holds the position that the war was run well during that time. This book is definitely more optimistic but that's not saying all that much. You get a lot of great details into how the idea for the "surge" came about, how Petraeus came to be in charge of it, and how the tide slowly started to turn. However, you aren't left with a whole lot of optimism that the situation is not going to start deteriorating quickly after we've pulled out of the major cities (i.e. as of 6/30/09).

The conventional wisdom about the Surge is that it worked because we finally had enough troops there to do the job. That's true, but it's misleading. The real change was one of strategy: we moved from having a small number of large forward operating bases (FOBs) just outside the city limits to engaging in classic counter-insurgency strategy by having lots of small bases located within the cities in neighborhoods. Once it was decided to adopt that strategy, the generals (namely Odierno and retired Gen Keane) estimated how many troops would be needed to accomplish it and discovered that they needed 30,000 more.

In military speak, the "center of gravity" changed from seeking out and destroying insurgent and terrorist cells to protecting the local population with the hope being that once trust was gained with the people and local tribal leaders that they would assist the military in helping apprehend "unfriendlies". And indeed that is exactly what happened. After an initial spike in violence as the troops moved into hostile areas, casualties dropped dramatically and the focus of attacks increasingly became U.S. forces instead of locals.

So why the pessimism? Well, one of the least publicized aspects of the Surge is that one of the principle reasons for the decline in violence (at least initially) was due to the U.S. military deciding to put members of the Sunni insurgency on the payroll to get them to stop fighting. From the book:

This may have been the biggest gamble Petraeus took as the commander of the war in Iraq. He was going behind the back of the Baghdad government to put its enemies on the American payroll. Strikingly, he didn't seem to think he needed to get clearance from the American government, either. When asked about how he had gotten the president to agree to the program, he indicated that he hadn't asked Bush about it. "I don't think it was something that we needed to ask permission for. We had the authority to conduct what are called security contracts, and that was how we saw these."


In other words, the insurgents (particularly those not religiously motivated) were happy to lay down there arms as long as they were being paid to do so. They were paid ostensibly to keep security in their own neighborhoods, but of course the truth of the matter was that with them no longer creating the violence there was not a lot of security forces needed.

All of the strategic steps taken during the Surge were with one goal in mind: creating enough temporary stability to allow the political process to move forward. And quite simply that has not happened. 5 years since the first Iraqi elections and there is still not an agreement in place for territories to share oil revenue; an item that was one of their top priorities. Maddeningly, as the violence got better the politics have actually gotten worse. With the situation not as dire, a lot of the politicians have decided that instead of forging compromises they can afford to take harder lines and be more demanding. The bottom line is that right now Iraq is not a melting pot so much as it is oil and water. As a group the Shias, Sunnis, and Kurds simply don't like each other much, and it's just very hard imagining them co-existing peacefully without the U.S. acting as constant mediators.

And in case you are not utterly sick of me rambling on about this subject, here are some other quotes from the book that I found interesting:


“The surge may have bought transitory successes . . . but it has done so by stoking the three forces that have traditionally threatened the stability of Middle Eastern states: tribalism, warlordism, and sectarianism.”

"One of the lessons of the twentieth century, noted David Kilcullen, the counterinsurgency expert, was that “there has never been a successful counterinsurgency that took less than 10 years.”

"A senior intelligence officer in Iraq described the long-term American goal as 'a stable Iraq that is unified, at peace with its neighbors, and is able to police its internal affairs, so it isn’t a sanctuary for al Qaeda. Preferably a friend to us, but it doesn’t have to be.' He paused, then pointedly noted that his list doesn’t include democracy or the observation of human rights."

"The Americans have imposed power sharing on Iraq’s factions, he said, and that should worry us for several reasons. First, it produces what looks like peace but isn’t. Second, in such situations eventually one of the factions seeks to break out of the arrangement. 'Thus,' McCreary wrote, 'power sharing is always a prelude to violence,' usually after the force imposing it withdraws."

"'I don’t think the Iraqi civil war has been fought yet,' he said. 'I suspect Sadr is recruiting and amassing weapons and resources for that day we pull down our troop levels to the point where he can make a grab for the seat of power in Baghdad. I’m sure his boys are infiltrating all levels of the Iraqi army and police, and he is smart enough to wait until he realizes we are drawn down to a point where we can’t effectively stop him without a massive rebuild of troops, . . . a point where the American public will not stomach another buildup.'"

"The less the Iraqi generals need American support, the more they might be inclined to take control of the government, so one reason to keep a substantial number of troops there, said Biddle, was to deter them from launching a coup. One nightmare scenario, he noted, leads eventually to a Shiite general who takes over explicitly as a Shiite out to suppress the Sunnis—and who has at his disposal a military and an economy more effective and efficient than Saddam Hussein’s ever were. 'Imagine an Iraq-Iran axis with their oil wealth, a modern equipped army, in cahoots with each other,' he said."

"The role of Iran remains problematic. At this point it appears to be the biggest winner in the Iraq war, and perhaps in the region—both in the short term and long term. As former Iranian president Muhammed Khatami boasted to the scholar Vali Nasr, 'regardless of where the United States changes regimes, it is our friends who will come to power.' In other words, all Iran really has to do is stand back and collect its winnings as Iraqi Shiites take power and realize they have few allies in the region aside from Iran."

"Iraqi counterparts would candidly say they were just waiting for the Americans to depart so they could revert to their old methods of population suppression. Older officers 'would sit and tell us they wanted to go back to the old way underneath Saddam and were just waiting for the U.S. to leave,' reported Maj. William Arnold, who in 2007 advised a battalion of the Iraqi 9th Division (Mechanized), a particularly significant unit because it was part of the only armored brigade in the Iraqi army and so would be key to launching a military coup d’état. 'We felt that those guys would listen to us just because they were using us as a checkbook.'”

"Gen. Odierno said in my last interview with him in November 2008 that he thinks Iraqi commanders have improved and that they no longer will automatically revert to Saddam-era viciousness. 'I think two years ago that was true. I think maybe even a year and a half ago it was true. I think a year ago it was a little less true. I think today it’s less true.'”

"When you got to know them and they’d be honest with you, every single one of them thought that the whole notion of democracy and representative government in Iraq was absolutely ludicrous.”

"'We’re thinking in terms of Reconstruction after the Civil War,' Miller added. That may be a historically insightful way to think about the duration of the American presence in Iraq, but it probably is not a good sign politically, given that Reconstruction was a failure, giving rise to the Ku Klux Klan, a terrorist organization that for the next century violently intimidated American blacks and any whites who might seek to help them exercise their civil rights. Nor have Americans signed up for a century-long mission in Iraq."

"The heart of the Iraq matter still lies before us, Crocker maintained in both my interviews with him in Baghdad in 2008, and he likely is correct. 'What the world ultimately thinks about us and what we think about ourselves,' he said, 'I think is going to be determined much more by what happens from now on than what’s happened up to now.' In other words, the events for which the Iraq war will be remembered probably have not yet happened."

Friday, July 10, 2009

A Post on Retirement That I Don't Have a Good Title For

Sometimes, the federal government has a pretty good sense of humor. One of the best and longest running jokes they've come up with arrives in my mail annually when they send me an update on how much I have paid into Social Security and what my projected benefit will be when I retire. The fact that as of right now should I and others in my age group actually receive said benefit amount at retirement the entire country would be bankrupted is what makes it such a good joke.

The Economist did a special report on ageing a few weeks ago. I found this passage particularly enlightening:

When Otto von Bismarck introduced the first pension for workers over 70 in 1889, the life expectancy of a Prussian was 45. In 1908, when Lloyd George bullied through a payment of five shillings a week for poor men who had reached 70, Britons, especially poor ones, were lucky to survive much past 50. By 1935, when America set up its Social Security system, the official pension age was 65—three years beyond the lifespan of the typical American. State-sponsored retirement was designed to be a brief sunset to life, for a few hardy souls.
Now retirement is for everyone, and often as long as whole lives once were. In some European countries the average retirement lasts more than a quarter of a century. In America the official pension age is 66, but the average American retires at 64 and can then expect to live for another 16 years.


Though the report was well written, it essentially took 20 pages to say the following: we are all going to have to work longer. And for proof of that, you don't need a whole lot more than the preceding paragraph. Our current social security scheme only works when one of two conditions are met: 1) an ever increasing population; or 2) a constantly expanding economy. Number 1 has pretty much stopped already (we have population growth only because of immigration) and if nothing else I think that the last year has taught us the folly of being completely dependent on number 2. We have a surplus in Social Security right now because with the vast majority of the baby-boomers still working we have many more payors than payees in the system right now. Also from the Economist: "In 1950 the OECD countries had seven people aged 20-64 for every one of 65 and over. Now it is four to one—and on course to be two to one by 2050." A two to one ratio simply is not sustainable for paying social security in the current manner. Right now the average U.S. worker makes ~$40,000 per year, and the social security tax is a flat 6.2%. Thus, at 7-1 it means that we can afford to pay each retiree the equivalent of 43.4% (7*6.2%) of the average salary (43.4% of $40,000 = $17,360) and still be solvent. At 4-1, the figure drops to $9920 which is not great but at ~$800/month could provide a decent base for someone who presumably no longer has a mortgage or car payment, will have all their medical expenses paid by Medicare, and who hopefully has some private pension saved up to supplement. But at 2-1 we're now down to $413/month. Try living off of that

This is yet another great example of a problem that is actually very simple to understand, but almost impossible to solve; at least from a political standpoint. The math is quite easy. You either need to increase the retirement age (and thus increase the ratio of payors to payees), increase the social security tax rate to get more money per person into the system, or decrease the benefit amounts. How many Congressmen you suppose are lining up to sponsor legislation for any of those 3 ideas right now?

I think that probably the best solution, although far from ideal, is to take an arbitrary age (like 60) and say that if you're older than that as of right now you will still get your benefits at 65. But they will be reduced from their current levels. However, if you opt to work an additional two years, you will get your full benefit amount beginning at 67. For people aged 55-59 it's reduced benefits at 66 and full at 68 and for people 50-54 it would be 67 and 69. For everyone under 50 though, the retirement age will just be raised to 70.

Of course, the absolute best solution from an individual standpoint is to see to it that you can take care of your own retirement savings and then you can retire whenever the hell you want.

Monday, June 29, 2009

So, Apparently Michael Jackson Had a Monkey's Paw

* In the event that the above title makes absolutely no sense to you, allow me to refer you to here.

So, apparently somewhere in his worldwide travels Michael Jackson acquired a monkey's paw. And sometime in the last week he decided to use it. "I wish that the whole world would love me again" he said. Done.

Yes, in another one of life's ironies Michael Jackson died on the eve of embarking on his "comeback tour" and in so doing managed to revive his career and image far more effectively than he ever could have done while alive. I believe that it's quite probable that his music will be more popular now than it has been in 15 years. And anyone currently under 10 years old will probably grow up knowing about "creepy Michael" only as a side-note instead of the main attraction it had become for the rest of us these last 10 years.

I look around at all the tributes being paid to him and I am quite perplexed. I can't escape the feeling that no matter how you look at it a disservice has been done to someone. Although he still had lots of fans (as evidenced by the sold-out venues for his planned tour), most of the world was done with him. The general consensus seemed to be "Yeah, you were a good entertainer for a long time, and you made some great music. But you are just too creepy, and we can't get past it." Even the majority of the black community had turned on him. Seriously, you were more likely to hear a black man defend O.J. than defend Michael Jackson. I think Chris Rock's comments from Never Scared in 2004 sum it up pretty well:

Damn. It's all fucked. The world's fucked up man. Michael Jackson lost his mind. What the hell is wrong with Michael? Another kid? Another kid? I thought it was groundhog's day when I heard that shit. Another kid. Get the fuck out of here. That's how much we love Michael. We love Michael so much. We let the first kid slide. Another kid. I'm fuckin done. I'm done with Michael. I was a fan my whole life. I am fuckin' done! I'm handing in my glove. I saw Michael on 60 Minutes. Ed Bradley tried his best to make Michael look like a mammal. Someone that drinks water and breathes air, right? He gave Michael the easiest question in the world, the easiest GED questions in the world, and Michael could not pass the test. He said, "Oh Michael, do you think it's proper for a 45 year old man to sleep in the bed with 13 year old boys?"

[as Michael Jackson ]"Yes".

[as Ed Bradley]"Ok, ok, oh let me rephrase that question. Michael, would you let your children sleep in a bed with a 45 year old man that has been accused of child molestation?"

[as Michael]: "Yes".

Ed Bradley looked at Michael Jackson like he wanted to say, "Nigga, is you crazy?" Like he wanted to take the 60 Minutes clock and push the shit forward and say "get the fuck off my show!"Did you see Michael going to court? Motherfucker going to court 20 minutes late! What kind of black man gonna go to court 20 minutes late? This ain't Barbershop 2. This is court motherfucker. And he ain't even wearing a real suit to court. Coming in there looking like Captain Crunch. Shit, who's your lawyer, Franken Berry? You better take your black ass to Banana Republic to get you a decent suit. What is up with that boy?


So now the guy dies and all of a sudden it's like he was still the beloved figure that he was the year after Thriller was released. Like the last 27 years didn't happen. I'm all for paying tribute to someone's life, but it all seems just a bit phony to me. It's like, if you really were still a huge Michael Jackson fan, where you been the last 10 years? Where were you to show your support for him and let him know that you still stood by him while he was still alive and could have benefited from it

To be clear, there were a number of celebrities and family that really did stick by him through it all. I'm not talking about them. Nor am I talking about the fans that bought all of his albums and even the ones that were psychotic enough to stand out front of the courtroom and cheer for him during his last molestation trial. What I'm talking about are the endless parade of celebrities that are using his death to shove themselves in the spotlight for an extra 30 seconds. The media pirranhas who have made a living on blasting his every move for the last 15 years and now will put out an endless series of "special tribute" issues. Just last week, Us Weekly ran a page making fun of "Wacko Jacko fashion". What do you think the odds are that this week's issue will be a gushing 20+ pages of over-the-top sentimentality? And I'm talking about the legions of "fans" who were all too happy to pass on an endless parade of Michael Jackson jokes over the last 2 decades and now will shake their head and mutter something about "the tragedy of losing someone so young."

Look, I don't have a problem celebrating the guy's musical accomplishments (of which there are many), or somewhat looking the other way on some of his private issues (if nothing else, it is true that he was never convicted of any of his alleged sex crimes; though of course he settled more than one out of court). I think I am just a big believer that how people talk about you when you're dead should be how they talked about you when you were alive. In sci-fi terminology, I guess I am looking for more Speakers. A person's life should be remembered by the actions they took and the effect they had on others, not on how we later choose to remember those actions and effects. You wanna know how history gets rewritten? It's subtle ways like these

As a final note on this, I am reminded of the Japanese author Mishima. He was rather obsessed with death and basically believed that all things (people, plants, animals, or artistic creations) should be cut down at their peak physical form and beauty so as to avoid decay and be preserved that way for all time. You can't help but wonder, how many of those that died so young actually ended up preserving a far better legacy for themselves? People like Buddy Holly, Richie Valence, Kurt Cobain, Heath Ledger, and Sam Cooke come to mind. Did we miss out on 30 more years of genius, or a tragic downfall? We'll never know. If you could have asked him just before he died, would Michael Jackson have been willing to trade the years from ~1987 to 2009 to be remembered for all time as simply the greatest musical performer ever? I wonder what he would have said.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Are You F*!&ing Kidding Me?!?!?

You may want to mark this date down, because I am almost speechless. Please read this story. It redefines the word "ridiculous". It's the kind of thing where if it happened in a movie, everyone would talk about how far-fetched and unrealistic it was. If it happened on April 1st, you'd be absolutely certain that it was an April Fool's Day joke. And if you got this story forwarded to you on any other day, you'd be positive that it was from The Onion.

This is my favorite part of the story (which makes absolutely no sense if you haven't read it yet): "Democrats scored a tactical victory by seizing the official Senate gavel, which is large and made of black walnut, its whack echoing through the chamber with authority. Senator George H. Winner Jr., who was presiding over the Republican session, was left to peck the table in front of him with a small gavel used by Republicans for their private conferences.
“It’s better than the eyeglass case I was using before,” Mr. Winner said."

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

My Marginally Exciting Life

OK, so it's been two weeks and thus it's probably time for a new post. While there have been some new topical developments in the world (health care proposals, new financial regs, the Iranian election) I am not currently in the mood to dive into any of them yet, so instead I'll just give a brief update on my life the past couple weeks.

The 30th b-day party on the 13th was a lot of fun. All week leading up to it the weather forecast just kept looking crappier and crappier and I woke up on Saturday morning to some dark skies and some pretty bad rain. So it looked like our outdoor extravaganza would be turned into a house party. Fortunately though, the weather cleared up significantly around 1:30 and it turned into a really nice day. We fired up the grill and got the ladder golf going and I even got to do my first (and probably last) keg stand. We headed inside at about 8:15 and started playing some poker. Admittedly, that's when the evening starts to get a little hazy for me and I started to do some really smart things like forgetting how many cards are on the board in Texas Hold 'Em. I did make it till almost 5:00 A.M. though and I was the last one awake, so that's something of an accomplishment (right?).

Last Wednesday I went to the Cubs/Sox game with some work friends. If you're wondering which game that was, it's the game right before the Cubs decided to have 3 miraculous comeback wins in a row. Other than the outcome of the game, it was a lot of fun. The Cubs had been 4-0 in games I attended this year so my streak finally ended, which was kind of a bummer. As of right now I am only scheduled to go to 1 more game this year. If that holds, it will be the least number of Cubs games I've gone to in probably 9 years. I'm still convinced that the Cubs will make the playoffs and it will be game 5 of the NLDS when Anabelle will decide to make her appearance in the world. Of course, for that to happen the Cubs would have to actually win a playoff game, something they've failed to do in their last 9 attempts.

This past weekend I went down to Houston to visit all my peeps down there. Played golf a few times (terribly of course) and took the nieces and one of my nephews to see Up, which is now probably my favorite Pixar movie after Toy Story. Other than that, just did some relaxing and tried to stay out of the 100-degree/85% humidity heat.

The big mission over the next couple weeks is to finish the conversion of the spare bedroom/my man-cave into Anabelle's room. We're planning on doing all the painting and adding the chair rail (and if you know what that is you're ahead of where I was 10 days ago) over the 4th of July weekend and then I get to build the crib, which came last Wednesday. Hopefully, all my years of IKEA furniture-building have honed my skills. I have yet to have a piece of furniture that I've built collapse on me, but I most definitely have built some contraptions that I wouldn't trust my daughter's life with. Hopefully, it's somewhat idiot-proof.

Finally felt Anabelle kick for the first time last night. My juvenile mind instantly conjured up a scene from Billy Madison ("You feel that kick; he's gonna be a soccer player. Yes he is") and then I started picturing her with a little forehead light, whistling the theme from The Great Escape as she tries to figure out a way out of her temporary home.

Yeah, I'm definitely mature enough for fatherhood . . .

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

The End of an Era . . .

So, with my birthday less than 7 hours away this looks to officially be the last post of my 20s. And since there's not a whole lot of "topical" stuff that I have a lot to say about right now I'd thought I'd just do a little bit (ok, a lot bit) of musing on how I feel about growing older.

Quite frankly, I never saw this coming. It's not that I ever had some premonition of doom that I wouldn't ever make it to my 30th, it's just that you never really picture it. More than anything, it just never really feels "real". For the vast majority of your life, you look forward to each birthday, happy and excited to be "growing up". Then you hit about 24/25. The novelty of being able to drink legally has worn off. You stay out till 3:00 A.M. on a work night just frequently enough to remind yourself why you don't do it more often. If you're really lucky (like me), you find someone you love and get married and start to think about your career rather than just your job. Your life starts to settle down a little bit and you start to think that you've arrived at some destination. You're grown.

But then a real funny thing happens. Or actually, a funny thing doesn't happen. Time refuses to stand still for you. It has this stubborn way of continuing to move on and on with no regard to your personal agenda. It's like you're travelling on a bus and just when you thought you were about to pull into the station it just keeps driving by instead at the same speed it's always gone. And once that finally sinks in, you get hit with the thought that the bus is only going to stop once; at the end. And you really have no idea what road it's going to take you down and how short/long that road's going to be.

The strange thing is, none of the rules have changed. And you know that none of the them have changed. It's you that's changed, and your reaction to the rules changes with it. Had I read the above couple paragraphs 10 years ago, I doubt I would have found anything enlightening about them at all. I never had any delusions of immortality. But there's a vast gulf between "knowing" something in the abstract and "knowing" something through experience. On one level, I "know" what it would feel like to witness the Cubs win the World Series, but I don't think that I really do. I "know" what it's going to feel like to hold my daughter for the first time, but at the same time I couldn't be more clueless.

There are just some things that have to be experienced to be understood.

That's a sentence that probably would have driven me nuts up until a couple of years ago. Hell, I'm sure that there will be many times where it will drive me nuts in the future. Nobody likes being told that they can't understand something, especially for a reason as seemingly arbitrary as the year on their birth certificate. "You'll understand when you're older" is probably one of the most infuriating sentences in the English language to be on the receiving end of. A lot of times, it's just a way of saying "I can't really defend my position against yours, so I'm just going to assume I'm right since I'm older". But sometimes it isn't. Sometimes it's true. I think part of growing wise instead of just growing old is recognizing the difference between the two.

The expression goes "age is just a number", and that's absolutely true. It's not that I've received some bolt of lightning over the last 24 hours that makes me feel the way I do. These are feelings that have steadily brewed over the last 5-6 years, and this occasion is simply the lightning rod for coalescing and expressing them. Or maybe the moment of enlightenment happens sometime over the next 6 hours. I'll let you know tomorrow.

I titled this entry "the end of an era" and I think that's about right. As my friend Joe succinctly put it last week "we're not kids anymore" and although that's probably been true for a while now it only really "feels true" now. I look at this time now much as I did as college was coming to an end. I had an unbelievably great time, but I was ready to move on. The last thing I would have wanted was to live the college lifestyle for the rest of my life. Yet even though I was ready, there is always the tinge of sadness that you are leaving something that you remember so warmly along with more than a little apprehension about venturing into the unknown.

As I have been writing this, I realized that I'm talking about becoming a parent at least as much (if not more) as I am about growing older. I can't help it; the two are inextricably linked to me right now.

So time marches on, and so we all must march with it. I stand here on the eve of my 30th and I can honestly say that I'm pretty fulfilled. I have not achieved perfection, because that is impossible. There are always disappointments, regrets, and (possibly the worst of all) the "what if?"s. But I like what I have done with my life, and I'm proud of what I have accomplished. Between an amazing wife, unbelievable friends, and a loving family I have more wonderful memories and incredible stories than I ever could have imagined. But most importantly, I am happy with the person I have become and am. The challenge for me now is to live the next 30 years (or however long I have left) so that I can stand here and say the same thing. I am filled with equal parts excitement and terror at the prospect, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Monday, June 01, 2009

Torture and Newborn Babies

Another post from our guest blogger Joe Mays. Please note that I've actually had this in my hands for 12 days and just haven't posted it until now, so this was written before the Cheney and Obama speeches on torture. Just wanted to clarify so that when Weir bitches about it not being timely the fault is mine, not Joe's.

I was thoroughly shocked last month when I discovered that roughly half of the country finds torture acceptable, but I'm even more disturbed at the public discourse around the practice. The debate that is constantly running on all of the 24 hour news networks always seems to be centered on one question -- does torture work?

This is completely backwards to me. Let me explain myself with an analogy...
Let's say your child is screaming on the seat behind me on an airplane. One way to solve the problem is to pull out my NRA-approved assault rifle and blow his cute little face off. The screaming will stop. Problem solved! My tactics worked!

I don't do that because it's immoral.

There are also unintended consequences. If I didn't blow a hole in the plane and we all crashed, I'd probably get mauled by everyone else on the plane - even those who agree that your screaming baby is annoying! Torture has consequences, too. There is a pretty strong consensus that the president did the right thing by *not* releasing the two-thousand or so torture photographs as demanded by the courts recently. Commanders on the ground noted that releasing the photos would cause an escalation in violence in Iraq and Afghanistan, and some of our troops would die because of the torture and humiliation the pictures portray.

Finally, if the moral issue *and* the fact that I would be making enemies out of allies aren't good enough reasons, the legal punishment for killing a newborn is overwhelming. I'd probably get a**raped in jail for the rest of my life. This is precisely why we need to prosecute those who torture -- a lot of people don't have any moral issue with torture, and some even think it is perfectly legal.

They are mistaken. The U.S. hanged Japanese commanders who waterboarded our soldiers during WWII. These executions, along with the treaties we signed banning the practice, made our nation's stance on the issue clear - torture is immoral and illegal.

If you're one of the people who always thought that torture is a good war strategy and should be used daily on everybody we capture, that's another discussion. I clearly disagree with you, and I expect our conversation will get as far as me telling you to f*ck off, and perhaps you saying the same.

This post is directed at those who used to think torture was immoral, but have changed their minds because they believe Cheney when he says "it works" (we know he's never lied before). Support for torture started increasing just after the attacks on the WTC and has continued to rise. Two months after 9/11, only 32% of Americans thought torture was acceptable. Apparently, the "torture isn't wrong because it works" argument is catching on...

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

And Now For Something a Little Light-Hearted . . .

On the heels of Obama's commencement speech at Notre Dame I thought we'd lighten things up a bit and talk about . . . abortion! More specifically, I'd like to echo our President's call for a more civil tone in the abortion debate. That might seem like an oxymoron, and it probably is, but for over 35 years now we've tried screaming at each other and it hasn't worked, so how about trying something else?

In the abortion debate, I am an anomaly. I am the only person I know of (though I'm quite sure there are many others) who has actually changed their mind on this issue (from pro-life to pro-choice). Apart from being raised Catholic, when I became a Republican in the mid-90s one of the main reasons I was pro-life is that I saw abortion as another example of a growing trend where people have a "victim" mentality and don't believe that they are responsible for their own actions. Judas Priest "made" my son kill himself. Marilyn Manson "made" those kids shoot up Columbine. Grand Theft Auto "made" these teenagers steal cars. I didn't like the detachment from personal responsibility that seemed to be growing in our culture. In many ways I still feel that way. At that time it was simply a matter of "you knew when you had sex that a baby was a possibility and now you've got to deal with the consequences of your actions." At that time I should add that I was still in favor of abortion in the cases of rape, incest, or endangerment to the mother.

As weird as it sounds, the thing that actually made me change my mind about abortion was reading Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged. For those that have not read it, no, abortion is not mentioned anywhere in the story. But what is present is Rand's philosophy of objectivism, which (to express it extremely simplisticly) emphasizes total respect for the rights of individuals and, as an extension of that, laissez-faire capitalism. It is very critical of people (and particularly government) intervening in the name of the "greater good." So I started thinking about some of the implications of this. Rand would say that most social programs are bad, because they perpetuate this victim mentality among those whom they purport to help. It's along the lines of "give a man a fish and he eats for a day, but teach him to fish and he eats for a lifetime." Rand would say that it's far better to allow the entrepreneurs of the world to thrive and create opportunities for the lower economic classes to seize, but only if they are willing to work for it. So, how does this relate to abortion? Well, I realized that if I was going to be in favor of eliminating a lot of social programs and telling the lower class that they wouldn't receive anymore handouts, it would be inconsistent to say "oh, and we're going to force you to have that baby even though we won't help you support it." It seemed to me that the only way I could justify being "cold" towards welfare is if I could truly say "well, it was your choice to have that baby."

Writing and rereading that paragraph feels very strange to me now. That's not really the reason I am pro-choice now but that really is the rationale that first led me to change my mind. Since that time I've become a little more pragmatic in believing that women who want abortions will still find ways to get them. I've also been swayed by things such as Freakonomics, which makes a fairly convincing case that Roe v Wade was the single biggest influence in the sudden drop in the crime rates in major urban cities in the early 90s.

So I bring all that up as background as a way of saying that I really do see both sides of this issue; at one time in my life I have passionately argued both sides of this. Even though I have a definite opinion on this issue, I by no means think that I'm unequivocally right. Hence, the only people whose opinion I don't respect on this issue are those who can't see how it's a very, very murky issue.

The question basically comes down to this: at what point does human life start? And one of the main troubles is that science can't answer that question for us. Most people agree that in the moment after you have a fertilized egg you don't have a human life yet and most people would also agree that the moment right before birth you do. So then you start counting forward and backwards. How about a minute after fertilization? A day? A month? How about a day, week, month before birth?

So, of course, with science unable to provide a definitive answer religion is all too happy to step in. That in and of itself is not a bad thing. Religion is there precisely to provide the answers that science cannot (yet) give us. It's just quite unfortunate that a religion (Christianity) that is above all about love, peace, and forgiveness is often presented with a face akin to that of a rabid dog on this issue.

If you are a Christian, you probably should be against abortion. If you believe that only the hand of God has the ability to create a human life, then it makes sense that you believe that life begins at conception. But you should also understand that your belief is just that: a belief. It's not a fact. And you should also be able to see that those who aren't Christians don't have that clear-cut answer, and for them it's a far murkier issue. A good Christian needs to be able to reconcle the fact that it is possible to be both a good moral person and be pro-choice.

I'm not suggesting that will change their mind on the abortion issue. I am hopeful though, that it will help change the tone.

(cringes as he hits "publish post", knowing that the last time abortion was brought up on this blog we got a crazy reverend advocating the bombing of abortion clinics in the comments)

Monday, May 18, 2009

Deja Vu All Over Again

Almost exactly a year ago I asked the question "Has Hollywood finally run out of ideas?" Today I ask the same question about Broadway. Christy and I had the pleasure and torture (respectively) of seeing Legally Blonde: The Musical on Friday night. Back in December we bought tickets to a series of 4 plays and this one was the first. The other three are Fiddler on the Roof, The Addams Family, and a new play called Spring Awakening. So that's one out of 4 original theatre productions. Then last week I get a form in the mail soliciting a renewal for the next series. Those plays: Young Frankenstein, Dreamgirls, 101 Dalmations, and the token one new play In the Heights. So one out of 4 again. Then, as I was scanning through the playbill (which, by the way, was the highlight of the performance) I noticed an ad for Mary Poppins and a "coming soon" poster for Shrek: The Musical. Oh, and by the way, the theatre where we're seeing all these (The Oriental) just got done housing Wicked for the last 3 and a half years. Technically, Wicked is an original (but only in the strictest sense) but it's still a prequel (and doesn't everybody just love prequels!) and certainly only "works" if the audience is familiar with The Wizard of Oz.

Has Broadway now basically become the new action figures for movies? Something that just automatically accompanies a hit film/franchise? If we wait long enough are we going to see musical versions of The Dark Knight and Saw (actually, that I would like to see)? It's not so much that the plays aren't new. Apart from the plays that have been turned into movies (e.g. Chicago, Phantom of the Opera, Rent) there really is not a DVD equivalent for theatre, so I don't really have a problem with Cats or Fiddler on the Roof coming around every couple years. I just don't like the ultra-formulaic exercise of taking an existing movie, transplanting all scenes and plot points wholesale into a stage script, and slapping together super-cheesy, bubble-gum pop ballads and inserting them every 5 minutes and calling it something "All New!" It just shows a tremendous lack of creativity. It seems like Broadway is following the lead of Hollywood in that they are so terrified of making an expensive flop that unless Andrew Lloyd Weber is willing to attach his name to it you'd better already have a built-in audience or it's not getting made.

Look, I am not a complete artistic purist by any stretch of the imagination. Hollywood and Broadway only exist to make money. I always thought that the job of a producer and director was to look at something and see promise and/or to say, at various points in the process, "ok, it's good but we need to do X here, " or "it's dragging in this spot, we need to rewrite this so we don't lose the audience." To me, this seems like 1) producers have lost all cajones and are afraid to take any risk; or 2) they have absolutely no idea how to spot good ideas/scripts anymore and they know it.

It used to be that movies were seen as "for the masses" and theatre was viewed as being (for lack of a better term) more cultured. To use an analogy, if the average movie is a Miller Lite, than theatre was a Heineken. Not for everyone, but for those that like it there's no comparison on the quality. So now it seems like Broadway has decided that there isn't enough money in Heineken so they better start serving Miller Lite too. That's all well and good, but if I'm now gonna get the same product at 4-5 times the price, remind me why I'm going again?

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Food for Thought

First off, although very minor this is probably the funniest story of the year. It's good to see that there appear to be others besides me with a Taco Bell obsession.

Next, from an article in the New York Times, a new report shows Medicare and Social Security now going broke even earlier than expected. Social Security is now set to go bust in 2037 (4 years earlier than previously estimated), while Medicare will be broke by 2017 (2 years earlier than thought). While estimates are notoriously inaccurate, like the weather they tend to get more and more accurate the shorter the projection, and 2017 isn't that far away anymore. The culprit is, of course, the recession, so initially when I read this my first thought was "yeah, but once the economy improves it'll push those dates back out again, right?" Wrong. The current estimates already assume that the economy will return to growth later this year. Which means that if that doesn't happen the reality will be even worse, perhaps significantly so.

I'm not bringing this up for gloom and doom sake. Of the things that I worry about, the solvency of Social Security and Medicare don't even make the top 20. Of course, that might be because I already assume that those programs won't be around by the time I qualify for them. But I digress. From the article: "Spending on Social Security and Medicare totaled more than $1 trillion last year, accounting for more than one-third of the federal budget." So we're already at 1/3 the budget yearly and the baby-boomers have only just started to retire. It's important to keep things in perspective and in that respect all of this debate over stimulus plans and increased government spending programs, while still important, is really just something of a sideshow. The truth is that no matter what else happens, you will never have a sustainable balanced budget if you don't figure out how to manage these two programs. And to manage them, one of two things needs to occur: 1) raise taxes or 2) cut benefits. Some combination of the two is probably the most likely outcome. Anyone who tells you we can have the same benefits without raising taxes is mathematically challenged at best and a deceitful windbag at worst.

I think this would also be a good time to point out how disastrous the Republican plan for the privatization of social security accounts looks right now. Obviously we can't say for sure, because it looked pretty good for the 10 years before last October, but if the Social Security endowment had been in the stock market it would have easily shed 25% of its value and probably shaved about 10 years off of the projected insolvency date. And before anyone jumps down my throat for more Republican-bashing, I was fully in favor of this plan too so I am admitting that I was wrong as well. Maybe it will recover and still look like a good long-term plan again in the future, but I've already seen enough to think that a separation of retiree income from the ups and downs of the stock market is a good thing.

Thursday, May 07, 2009

Just Asking

Can someone explain to me why the movie Catwoman is on AMC? AMC, by the way, stands for American Movie Classics. Or at least it used to. Apparently, although they have not officially changed their name they've taken a page from KFC and just want to now be known ambiguously by their initials. All I know is that the only thing "classic" about that film is that it is a classic example of how to lose all the prestige of winning a Best Actress Oscar as quickly as possible.

Can we get a little consistency in the headlines please? I open up this article and I feel pretty good and then I open this one and I feel like I should run around screaming with my hands waving frantically over my head Godzilla-movie style. So, let me see if I've got this straight: either the swine flu epidemic is almost over or it's on its way to infecting one third of the world's population. That is (ahem) a bit of a large range. Maybe I should do this thing Price Is Right style and bid 2 billion and 1 people infected. Can I get my own article then? My favorite part though is the WHO chief who was quoted as saying "This is a benchmark from the past. Please do not interpret this as a prediction for the future." Judging by the title of the article, it doesn't look like they listened to him. Here's a good investment tip: put money in the pharmaceutical companies that make flu shots.

And finally, what the f*ck is wrong with people? OK, let's make it multiple choice:

When you are getting into a fight over beer pong, are you:

A) Psychotically competitive
B) In desperate need of anger management counseling
C) An irredeemable douchebag
D) All of the above