Well, as much as it saddens me to have to replace my favorite blog title to date, it has been almost 2 weeks since I last wrote anything and it's probably time.
I'll start with a marathon training update. This past week was a planned light week although I ended up making it even lighter than scheduled, running only 10 miles total. Not good, but hopefully I have allowed my body to prepare itself for the rough road ahead. The next 3 weeks figure to be pretty brutal, as I need to log totals of 30, 32, and 39 miles each week. The good news is that once I get to the end of this stretch I really am pretty much done. Well, except for the small detail of running the actual marathon itself on October 7th.
After some brief forays into fiction for a while, I returned to reading non-fiction this past week when I picked up The Secret Man by Bob Woodward. It was written and published immediately after the identity of Deep Throat (the informant from Watergate) was finally revealed as No. 2 FBI-man Mark Felt. Woodward discusses in depth how he originally met him and for the first time provides details on how they would signal each other and the exact nature of the info that he provided. I've always had something of a fascination with Watergate and that made this book an essential read. It really helps to tie together all the ends that have until now intentionally been left loose in order to protect the source's identity. Woodward also gives a couple of interesting anecdotes about how close others came to guessing the source (and some who actually did) and how close the lid was to being blown off at any given time. It's also just interesting to reflect on the accomplishment of keeping something like this a secret for 30 years. Lastly, there's a couple of great ironies to be found. Stemming from the House investigation into the FBI's handling of Watergate, Felt was actually indicted on charges of conducting unauthorized searches on suspects. At his trial, former President Nixon testified on his behalf (the only time Nixon ever testified in court after resigning). Felt was found guilty, but a few years later Reagan pardoned him. So, basically, the man who was almost single-handedly responsible for bringing down Nixon has Nixon himself show up at his trial to defend him and then gets pardoned by Reagan. In any case, the only thing that's disappointing about the read is that you never really get a clear understanding of the exact motives Felt had when he did it. There's a lot of pretty well grounded speculation on Woodward's part, but in the end speculation is just that. Ultimately, the reason for this is that Woodward and Felt's relationship was pretty icy after Watergate and they really didn't speak for over 20 years. When Woodward finally gets up the courage to track him down again, what he finds is a frail old man in his mid-80s that suffers from dementia and can barely remember who Nixon was, let alone any of the specifics behind his downfall. If it were a novel you'd definitely call it anti-climactic but I think it just serves to remind us that real life doesn't like to wrap up all the loose ends most of the time.
Also watched a few movies this past week: Vacancy, Persona, and Letters From Iwo Jima.
Vacancy deserves only a one-word review: lame.
Persona (an old Ingmar Bergman film) deserves quite a bit more but I can sum it up with one word: huh? This movie really confused me, and even after I read two Ebert articles about it I still can't say whether they helped me figure things out or just confused me more. If you are into classic and/or foreign cinema and/orBergman films, then you absolutely need to see it but if you don't fall into any of those groups I can't imagine you liking it. And I generally love weird movies (like pretty much any David Lynch film except Inland Empire) but I'm just not sure about this one. I think the real problem is that most of the movie is presented very "normally" and then just all of a sudden it veers off into these really weird tangents for a minute or two before returning. At least with a Lynch film I'm expecting a midget and a person wearing an antelope head to come onscreen at any given moment so I'm not so caught off guard when it happens.
Letters From Iwo Jima I was really impressed with; definitely the best war film I've seen since Saving Private Ryan. It is very unique in that although it is an American film it shows the battle from the perspective of the Japanese and thus is portraying the U.S. as the "enemy". You also get a really interesting glimpse into the conflict that was going on in Japan at the time between modern "Westernized" thinking and their classic samurai culture. When the acting general (who has spent time studying in America) orders a battalion to retreat from their post and rendevous with another squadron at a fall-back position, the head of the battalion disobeys the order and he and most of his men commit suicide by falling on their own grenades. Looking at it now, it's inescapable to not think "wow, what a waste" but that's such a great illustration of a nation with an identity crisis. The strategic move is clearly to conserve your forces and rally them at a new tactical position, but the samurai way dictates that you will die with honor where you stand before you abandon your post for any reason. As you look at the Japan that exists today as a technological powerhouse among first-world nations, it's pretty evident what manor of thinking won out in the end.
I also sort of saw Superbad on Friday night, but fell asleep a little under half-way through. From what I remember, it was really funny.
Have some other interesting news, but I want to save it since this is already too long and I want to make sure I have something interesting to talk about next time. I know that all 4 of you can hardly contain your excitement . . .
Monday, August 27, 2007
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Screw You Weir
Is that a good enough title for you?
Actually, I have to do something now that pains me immensely. I find myself in the unenviable position of having to admit that, shockingly and against all odds, Eric Weir was right about something. He successfully predicted my half-marathon time within 32 seconds. He said I'd knock it out in 2 and a half hours and my official finishing time clocked in at 2:29:28. I will add though, that unofficially my time was 2:28:19, which is what I had on my watch. I think the discrepancy is due to my chip activating a little early while I was still behind the starting line. In any case, my time puts me at about an 11:22 min/mile pace, which is truly mindblowing considering that I have been training at right around 12 min/mile and I had never done 13 miles before. What can I say, I guess I'm a gamer. As another pedestrian achievement, I was in fact the fastest Delaney in the race. I don't know who Tony Delaney is; I just know he's 2 minutes slower than me. Anyways, as of today I am officially recommitted to doing the marathon. Looking at my training schedule, it's actually not as bad as I thought. I really only have 4 more hellacious runs to do before the marathon; a 14-miler this weekend, a 16-miler on Sept 2, an 18-miler on Sept 9th, and a 20-miler on Sept 16th. Actually, the whole week of the 16th pretty much sucks, as I'm supposed to run a grand total of 39 miles (5-10-4-20). But after that I get to taper off for 3 weeks before the big race on October 7th.
In other exciting news, Christy and I just bought a new Prius! Actually, more accurately we will be buying it tonight. We went in yesterday and put down a deposit and the car came in today, so we will be picking it up tonight at 7:30. It will be the first new car that either of us have ever owned, and also will be quite an upgrade from our current Sunfire as well as the Escort we owned before that. We had intended to go look at a number of dealerships yesterday but after we saw the Prius we both just really liked it and decided we didn't need to look any farther. One of the cool things that will take some getting used to is the fact that the car does not have any rearview mirrors. It has a camera mounted in the trunk that shows up on a display in front of you. Very strange to back up without looking behind you, but I think the many hours I wasted playing video games will finally pay off!
While recovering from the half-marathon Sunday and yesterday, I finally got around to watching Ben-Hur. That film had the distinction of being the DVD that I have owned the longest without ever watching (~4 years). Overall I can see why the film is a classic and it has held up well almost 50 years after it was made. It is truly amazing to look at all the extravagant sets, costumes, and the sheer number of extras that were used. In modern films when you see ancient cities recreated you just assume that only a small part of it was built and the rest was all CGI. But back then they didn't have any of that so they had to build it all for real. The highlight of the film, of course, is the big 20-minute chariot race 2/3 of the way through the movie. While it lacks the explosions and manic energy of modern action movies, it again just blows your mind that something like this could be done with little to no special effects. I read later that the colliseum where the race takes place was at that time the most expensive and elaborate set ever built and that the whole sequence took over 3 months to film. I also learned that Charleton Heston really had to learn how to drive the chariot and that there is only one stunt in the sequence where a double is used. In any case, the only semi-negative I can say about the film is that it is very in-your-face Christian. Jesus shows up at pivotal points and if you're not a Christian yourself a lot of the revelry and awe that the characters feel and the story expects you to feel just won't be there. But, as long as you know that going in I don't see that as really detracting from the experience.
By the way, if you haven't gotten around to seeing The Simpsons Movie yet I highly recommend it. If you do, stick around for 3-4 minutes after the credits start to roll.
Actually, I have to do something now that pains me immensely. I find myself in the unenviable position of having to admit that, shockingly and against all odds, Eric Weir was right about something. He successfully predicted my half-marathon time within 32 seconds. He said I'd knock it out in 2 and a half hours and my official finishing time clocked in at 2:29:28. I will add though, that unofficially my time was 2:28:19, which is what I had on my watch. I think the discrepancy is due to my chip activating a little early while I was still behind the starting line. In any case, my time puts me at about an 11:22 min/mile pace, which is truly mindblowing considering that I have been training at right around 12 min/mile and I had never done 13 miles before. What can I say, I guess I'm a gamer. As another pedestrian achievement, I was in fact the fastest Delaney in the race. I don't know who Tony Delaney is; I just know he's 2 minutes slower than me. Anyways, as of today I am officially recommitted to doing the marathon. Looking at my training schedule, it's actually not as bad as I thought. I really only have 4 more hellacious runs to do before the marathon; a 14-miler this weekend, a 16-miler on Sept 2, an 18-miler on Sept 9th, and a 20-miler on Sept 16th. Actually, the whole week of the 16th pretty much sucks, as I'm supposed to run a grand total of 39 miles (5-10-4-20). But after that I get to taper off for 3 weeks before the big race on October 7th.
In other exciting news, Christy and I just bought a new Prius! Actually, more accurately we will be buying it tonight. We went in yesterday and put down a deposit and the car came in today, so we will be picking it up tonight at 7:30. It will be the first new car that either of us have ever owned, and also will be quite an upgrade from our current Sunfire as well as the Escort we owned before that. We had intended to go look at a number of dealerships yesterday but after we saw the Prius we both just really liked it and decided we didn't need to look any farther. One of the cool things that will take some getting used to is the fact that the car does not have any rearview mirrors. It has a camera mounted in the trunk that shows up on a display in front of you. Very strange to back up without looking behind you, but I think the many hours I wasted playing video games will finally pay off!
While recovering from the half-marathon Sunday and yesterday, I finally got around to watching Ben-Hur. That film had the distinction of being the DVD that I have owned the longest without ever watching (~4 years). Overall I can see why the film is a classic and it has held up well almost 50 years after it was made. It is truly amazing to look at all the extravagant sets, costumes, and the sheer number of extras that were used. In modern films when you see ancient cities recreated you just assume that only a small part of it was built and the rest was all CGI. But back then they didn't have any of that so they had to build it all for real. The highlight of the film, of course, is the big 20-minute chariot race 2/3 of the way through the movie. While it lacks the explosions and manic energy of modern action movies, it again just blows your mind that something like this could be done with little to no special effects. I read later that the colliseum where the race takes place was at that time the most expensive and elaborate set ever built and that the whole sequence took over 3 months to film. I also learned that Charleton Heston really had to learn how to drive the chariot and that there is only one stunt in the sequence where a double is used. In any case, the only semi-negative I can say about the film is that it is very in-your-face Christian. Jesus shows up at pivotal points and if you're not a Christian yourself a lot of the revelry and awe that the characters feel and the story expects you to feel just won't be there. But, as long as you know that going in I don't see that as really detracting from the experience.
By the way, if you haven't gotten around to seeing The Simpsons Movie yet I highly recommend it. If you do, stick around for 3-4 minutes after the credits start to roll.
Friday, August 10, 2007
So again I have allowed myself to slack. Been very busy lately, but at least it's because of fun stuff. After Hawaii, the following Saturday we made our yearly pilgrimmage into the bleachers at Wrigley, only to watch the Cubs lose 3-2. However, much beer was drank and a generally good time was had by all. The following weekend we went up to Alpine Valley to camp and see Jimmy Buffett. Much beer was drank and a generally good time was had by all. Then I just spent the last week down in Houston visiting family. So basically I decided that Chicago in August just wasn't quite hot enough for me and I needed to go to one of the few places that was both hotter and more humid. Seriously, around this time down there you have to swim through the air and bail it out of your car with buckets. While there, though, I did get a chance to attend two Cubs games, which (of course) they lost. However, much beer was drank and a generally good time was had by all. Are you sensing a theme here? Actually, the second game I went to I had an opportunity to sit in the Crawford boxes, which are the couple rows directly above the scoreboard in left field. It's a prime spot to catch a home run ball, since it's only 315 feet right down the line. Looking out from home plate, our seats were immediately to the right of the foul pole. 10 minutes into the game, Cliff Floyd hit a ball that was just foul and landed less than 10 feet from us. We thought that was just the beginning of the excitement, but alas no other ball got within 50 feet of us the rest of the game. Still, the seats were great and I'll definitely try to sit there again next time me and the Cubs come to town.
This weekend is the half marathon, and I would by lying if I said I was not dreading it. I ran 12 miles on Monday (in 2 hours, 27 minutes) and ran a very fast 5 yesterday (52:54; well, it's fast for me anyway), so I do feel like I'm physically prepared, but mentally . . . Also, all my training (except for the one 3.5 mile race I ran in April) has been on a treadmill, so it will be a big change to be on the pavement. And of course the final obstacle is that the race kicks off at 6:30 A.M. Sunday morning, so I'll be getting up at around 5:15. I guess the good news is that I should be done by 9:30 and then I can go home and crash for 3 hours before the Cubs game starts. Anyway, I will be honest and admit that my will to run the marathon is weakening (but not broken . . .yet), so I am using this race as a barometer. Best I can figure is that I should finish in ~2:47:00; if I finish ahead of that I'll feel pretty good about my chances of finishing the marathon in under 6 hours; if I finish over that I won't feel so good. And if it takes me more than 3 hours . . .
One thing of interest I saw in the news yesterday was a new study that found that women with breast implants are more likely than average women to commit suicide (http://tinyurl.com/3clnet). I don't know how much was spent on this study, but they could have paid me $10 and I would have told them the same thing. I think it would be fair to say that women who get breats implants are more likely to have lower self-esteem than average women. If we all accept that as true, then this study boils down to the stunning discovery that women with lower self-esteem are more likely to commit suicide. Truly groundbreaking, no? The study goes on to say that "women with breast implants also had a tripled risk of death from alcohol and drug use". It's almost as if the demographic of women with implants overlaps heavily with the hard-partying crowd. Next you're going to tell me that all those nice young strippers aren't really just working to pay their way through college. All of my bubbles are bursting at one.
OK, that's all I got today (I know it ain't much). I will definitely check in early next week with an update on how the half went and the prognosis for the biggun in October.
Have a great weekend!
This weekend is the half marathon, and I would by lying if I said I was not dreading it. I ran 12 miles on Monday (in 2 hours, 27 minutes) and ran a very fast 5 yesterday (52:54; well, it's fast for me anyway), so I do feel like I'm physically prepared, but mentally . . . Also, all my training (except for the one 3.5 mile race I ran in April) has been on a treadmill, so it will be a big change to be on the pavement. And of course the final obstacle is that the race kicks off at 6:30 A.M. Sunday morning, so I'll be getting up at around 5:15. I guess the good news is that I should be done by 9:30 and then I can go home and crash for 3 hours before the Cubs game starts. Anyway, I will be honest and admit that my will to run the marathon is weakening (but not broken . . .yet), so I am using this race as a barometer. Best I can figure is that I should finish in ~2:47:00; if I finish ahead of that I'll feel pretty good about my chances of finishing the marathon in under 6 hours; if I finish over that I won't feel so good. And if it takes me more than 3 hours . . .
One thing of interest I saw in the news yesterday was a new study that found that women with breast implants are more likely than average women to commit suicide (http://tinyurl.com/3clnet). I don't know how much was spent on this study, but they could have paid me $10 and I would have told them the same thing. I think it would be fair to say that women who get breats implants are more likely to have lower self-esteem than average women. If we all accept that as true, then this study boils down to the stunning discovery that women with lower self-esteem are more likely to commit suicide. Truly groundbreaking, no? The study goes on to say that "women with breast implants also had a tripled risk of death from alcohol and drug use". It's almost as if the demographic of women with implants overlaps heavily with the hard-partying crowd. Next you're going to tell me that all those nice young strippers aren't really just working to pay their way through college. All of my bubbles are bursting at one.
OK, that's all I got today (I know it ain't much). I will definitely check in early next week with an update on how the half went and the prognosis for the biggun in October.
Have a great weekend!
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Insert Clever Title Here
So I finished the new (and last) Harry Potter book last night at around 12:30. Started reading it on Sunday, so that makes it 4 days to read 759 pages. Of course, the type is large, the indents are big, and the spacing is more than ample, so really I'd say it's about equivalent to a "normal" 400-45o page book. I was told by my brother Zac that this was a "weak performance" by Harry Potter fan standards, but then he told me that he had purposefully started the day by waking up at 8:30 to watch billiards on ESPN and then he baked a cake, so I'm not so sure he's in a position to criticize anyone. Anyway, the book (which I won't spoil) is excellent. It is very refreshing to see that something that was so mammothly hyped still managed to not disappoint. While I can't say that it's my favorite of the series (I like "Goblet of Fire" the best) I can't think of a better way that it could have ended. It also firmly convinced me of something I suspected ever since I read "Order of the Phoenix" (which I absolutely hated). After "Goblet of Fire", I think Rowling had a pretty clear idea of how it was all going to end, or at least a good outline of the final story arc. But, it was really only 2 books worth of material, so she needed a way to kind of "mark time" for a book before she could start it, and the result was a generally horrid waste of time. Yes, there were a couple of things introduced in that book that come back later, but there are more strange things that never get resolved and characters acting completely unnaturally and, most importantly, very little happening in the whole book. Anyway, while the first 4 books can somewhat stand on their own as individual stories (having at least some semblance of an arc that is introduced and resolved by the end), the 6th and 7th books are clearly just one story and can very much be likened to Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. People reading this series in the future may be able to stop for a while after each of the first 5 books, but most likely no one will even take a coffee break between the 6th and 7th.
Well, while we're speaking of things that are interesting to some people and could not be any less interesting to others, I'd like to revisit my preseason Cubs preview. I was tempted to give an update on this towards the end of May, and let's just say that I am very glad that I waited. Had I done it then, it probably would have looked something like this: "I was wrong. All wrong. There's not even the faintest trace of right in anything I said. I am utterly baffled by my wrongness. You would think, just by sheer chance and law of averages, that one of my statements would have been right, but no. I was wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong." Now, however, things are a little different. I hesitate to write about it for fear of jinxing the team, but I suppose if I am to believe that the Cubs ever have a chance to win it all (and I do), then I have to stop believing in curses, hexes, and such. Anyway, the Cubs season so far has been a tale of Jekyll and Hyde. The first two months, they were one of the most overpaid, underperforming group of stooges to ever don a uniform. All the bounces went against them, and it was Murphy's law everyday. If they managed to get a clutch hit, you were absoutely stunned. The last two months, it seems that they can do almost nothing wrong and all the breaks are going their way. Now, the couple times when they DON'T get a clutch hit, you feel stunned. I'm not going to talk in too much depth about it, since those that care already know all this and those that don't have probably already skipped this paragraph. All I'll say is that the whole Cubs season can be summarized in Carlos Zambrano's numbers: his record through June 1st was 5-5 with a 5.62 ERA. His record since is 8-2 with a 1.56 ERA. Anyway, while I don't think the Cubs are quite as good as they have played lately, I am very optimistic that the "real" Cubs are closer to this version than the one that took the field the first 2 months, and I am just going to enjoy the hot streak while it lasts (which will hopefully go through October).
Heading up to Wisconsin this weekend to camp and see Jimmy Buffett at Alpine Valley. I believe this will mark the 5th time I've seen him, and the first time at Alpine. To date, the band I've seen the most times is Van Halen (also 5 times), so this will tie that. However, since one of those times was during the ill-fated Gary Cherone experiment, I'm not sure it really counts. And since Buffett manages to keep coming back every year and Van Halen . . . uh . . .doesn't, it seems like only a matter of time before I've officially seen him more. Besides those two, the only band/acts I have seen more than once are Mike Doughty (3X solo and once with Soul Coughing) , Joe Satriani (3X), BB King (2X), Buddy Guy (2X), and Eric Johnson (2X). I'd feel better about myself as a person if a couple of those names weren't on the list (hint: I'm not talking about Mike, BB, and Buddy).
Going to see The Simpsons movie tonight at midnight with my bro. Not expecting anything fantastic, but it should be fun. It's always fun to see a midnight show or a premier; always makes it seem like much more of an event to go to a movie, like it was back in the day. Over/Under on number of people I see dressed as Simpsons characters: 15.
Quick marathon update: Did end up running the 10 miles after work on Friday (1:59:37; 11:58 min/mile pace). Wasn't fun, but I did it. Brought my total mileage for last week up to 24, which I'm pretty proud of. This week hasn't been as good. Legs were still sore for a while, so I eased back in with a 3-mile run Monday (31:59; 10:40 min/mile pace) and then a 6-miler Wednesday (1:10:37; 11:46 min/mile pace). Gonna try to get an 11-miler in tomorrow before heading out of town. The half marathon looms large 2 weeks from Sunday.
Have a good weekend everyone (by which I mean all 5 of you)!
Well, while we're speaking of things that are interesting to some people and could not be any less interesting to others, I'd like to revisit my preseason Cubs preview. I was tempted to give an update on this towards the end of May, and let's just say that I am very glad that I waited. Had I done it then, it probably would have looked something like this: "I was wrong. All wrong. There's not even the faintest trace of right in anything I said. I am utterly baffled by my wrongness. You would think, just by sheer chance and law of averages, that one of my statements would have been right, but no. I was wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong." Now, however, things are a little different. I hesitate to write about it for fear of jinxing the team, but I suppose if I am to believe that the Cubs ever have a chance to win it all (and I do), then I have to stop believing in curses, hexes, and such. Anyway, the Cubs season so far has been a tale of Jekyll and Hyde. The first two months, they were one of the most overpaid, underperforming group of stooges to ever don a uniform. All the bounces went against them, and it was Murphy's law everyday. If they managed to get a clutch hit, you were absoutely stunned. The last two months, it seems that they can do almost nothing wrong and all the breaks are going their way. Now, the couple times when they DON'T get a clutch hit, you feel stunned. I'm not going to talk in too much depth about it, since those that care already know all this and those that don't have probably already skipped this paragraph. All I'll say is that the whole Cubs season can be summarized in Carlos Zambrano's numbers: his record through June 1st was 5-5 with a 5.62 ERA. His record since is 8-2 with a 1.56 ERA. Anyway, while I don't think the Cubs are quite as good as they have played lately, I am very optimistic that the "real" Cubs are closer to this version than the one that took the field the first 2 months, and I am just going to enjoy the hot streak while it lasts (which will hopefully go through October).
Heading up to Wisconsin this weekend to camp and see Jimmy Buffett at Alpine Valley. I believe this will mark the 5th time I've seen him, and the first time at Alpine. To date, the band I've seen the most times is Van Halen (also 5 times), so this will tie that. However, since one of those times was during the ill-fated Gary Cherone experiment, I'm not sure it really counts. And since Buffett manages to keep coming back every year and Van Halen . . . uh . . .doesn't, it seems like only a matter of time before I've officially seen him more. Besides those two, the only band/acts I have seen more than once are Mike Doughty (3X solo and once with Soul Coughing) , Joe Satriani (3X), BB King (2X), Buddy Guy (2X), and Eric Johnson (2X). I'd feel better about myself as a person if a couple of those names weren't on the list (hint: I'm not talking about Mike, BB, and Buddy).
Going to see The Simpsons movie tonight at midnight with my bro. Not expecting anything fantastic, but it should be fun. It's always fun to see a midnight show or a premier; always makes it seem like much more of an event to go to a movie, like it was back in the day. Over/Under on number of people I see dressed as Simpsons characters: 15.
Quick marathon update: Did end up running the 10 miles after work on Friday (1:59:37; 11:58 min/mile pace). Wasn't fun, but I did it. Brought my total mileage for last week up to 24, which I'm pretty proud of. This week hasn't been as good. Legs were still sore for a while, so I eased back in with a 3-mile run Monday (31:59; 10:40 min/mile pace) and then a 6-miler Wednesday (1:10:37; 11:46 min/mile pace). Gonna try to get an 11-miler in tomorrow before heading out of town. The half marathon looms large 2 weeks from Sunday.
Have a good weekend everyone (by which I mean all 5 of you)!
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Things I've Learned Over the Last Two Weeks
Just got back from our great vacation in Hawaii and I'm not gonna give the play-by-play description of the trip since my wife is doing such an admirable job of it herself (insert plug for www.christydelaney.blogspot.com here). Anyway, I just wanted to start out with some general things that have been floating around in my head over the past couple of weeks.
- Only after being in Hawaii for a week will you find the following thoughts running through your head: "Well, sure it's one of the most beautiful waterfalls in the world, but can we walk down and swim in it? No, then let's skip it."
- Despite the fact that you are on vacation, if your wife is tired enough you can convince her to have Taco Bell for dinner. Twice.
- It's a very strange feeling when you see conch shells for sale on the side of the road the day after you've finished reading "Lord of the Flies"
- It's also a very strange feeling to be running on a treadmill and have OK Go come on your iPod.
- The all-you-can-eat prime rib and king crab leg buffet with unlimited champagne is possibly mankind's greatest achievement. Seriously; if the human race had to apply for a job somewhere, it would be on the resume.
- Walking 4 miles over treachorous terrain just to get to a waterfall is totally not worth it - until you see it and get to swim under it. The walk BACK, however . . .
- Just in case you were wondering, the slowest moving human being on Earth lives just north of the town of Hilo, HI and works at a small convenience store/deli. We ordered a shaved ice there and watched her being repeatedly passed by stationary objects as she made it. We were going to order 2, but our flight was leaving in just over 20 hours and I knew it would be a close call. As a purely scientific experiment, if you had a large group and needed to order more than 6 I'd be curious to see if she could make them before the sun explodes.
- Everywhere in Hawaii is beautiful, with the exception of Honolulu, which has all the charm of Omaha, NE.
- Listening to a Cubs game on your laptop at 8:15 A.M. while having breakfast on a balcony that overlooks the ocean is a really good way to start the day.
OK, I think that's about it. Overall I managed to finish 3 books while on vacation (with most of the reading getting done on the lengthy plane rides): the aforementioned Lord of the Flies (which I was supposed to have read in high school but never did) and two more books by Neil Gaiman (Neverwhere and The Anansi Boys). All of them were excellent and Neil Gaiman is fast becoming one of my favorite authors. In my opinion, he's a lot like Stephen King in that while he doesn't create great literature he is a phenomenal storyteller. I just saw a trailer for a movie called Stardust, which is based on his graphic novel series and is coming out in the next couple weeks. I probably would have waited to rent it but now I might have to see it in theatres. I haven't started War and Peace yet, because I know I am going to be reading the last Harry Potter book (pre-ordered months ago on Amazon) as soon as it comes out next week and once I get started on the behemoth I don't want to stop. I'm still trying to get through the bio on Einstein but alas I don't see it happening in the near future.
On the marathon training front, I can't say that I was completely dilligent while on vacation, but I did about as well as could be expected. The Sunday after we got there I was due to run 8 miles and I had every intention of doing so. Unfortunately, the hotel we were at decided that their exercise room should double as a sauna and it was just unbearably hot. I threw in the towel (actually multiple, sweat-soaked towels) at the 5-mile mark. On Tuesday we switched hotels and I got in my 4 miles as planned. But on Thursday I slacked again because it was a travel day (to the Big Island) and I didn't feel like waking up at 6. Sunday, I was due for 9 miles but felt exhausted after getting in at 5:20 A.M. so I ended up pushing it off till Monday but got it done in 1:51:41 (12:24 min mile pace). This morning I woke up early and ran 5-miles in a personal best time of 53:37 (10:44 min mile pace). I am supposed to run a 10-mile race in Darien, IL this Saturday but I've already decided I am skipping it since I have a Cubs game to go to at noon and that's just asking for disaster. I'm still going to run the 10 miles, though, either Friday night or Saturday morning though. Hoping to do it in right around 2 hours. I will admit that the training is starting to get pretty brutal. It's not so much the getting tired as it is just the drudgery of being on a treadmill that long. I probably should start running outside but the humidity is pretty brutal unless I get out there at 6:00 A.M.
The one bit of other news is that I decided to take a meditation class at the Zen Buddhist temple. It's something I've been wanting to do for a long time, ever since I read Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind and The Three Pillars of Zen about 5 years ago but just never seemed to get around to it. Last night was the first class and it went well. I don't think "hard" is the right word for it but it's definitely different trying to use my mind in a way that I never have before. I think it will do me a lot of good, though, and not just in helping me calm down when Will Ohman walks consecutive batters to walk in the go-ahead run in the 8th inning, you stupid ^&^#$%!!!!! As you can see, I have a long way to go to achieve inner peace.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Chills, Thrills, and Michael F'N Bay!
I'll start out by saying that my all-time record for most movies seen in a theatre in a week is 12 (actually seen in the span of 4 days). This occurred while I was visiting my parents in Houston over Christmas right after I graduated in 2000. This is not something I recommend. The movies I saw, in no particular order, were: Proof of Life, Cast Away, Vertical Limit, Dungeons and Dragons, What Women Want, Dude, Where's My Car?, Miss Congeniality, Quills, The Family Man, The Grinch, Dracula 2000, and Little Nicky. I don't honestly remember any of them, unless I have seen them again since that time. They all just pretty much run together, and all I have is a vague sense of whether or not I liked them at the time. I bring this up because, although it is nowhere near my record, I have gone to the theatre 3 times in the past 5 days and I don't remember the last time I did that. So I figured I might as well post a review of them all, especially since 2 of them were advance previews (Live Free or Die Hard and Transformers) and the other (1408) is still less than a week old. So without further ado . . .
1408
It might not be saying much, but this is without a doubt the scariest PG-13 movie I've ever seen. It just goes to show you the oddities of the MPAA ratings criteria. They are always looking for the things you can quantify (i.e. how many uses of profanity, how many total seconds of nudity, and how much blood is shown) that when you get to some ambiguous things like tone and tension they have no idea what to do. So you end up with a film like this, which is far scarier than any Nightmare on Elm Street or Friday the 13th, going out the door with a PG-13 because there's almost no swearing and not a whole lot of blood. All I know is that had I gone to the theatre to see this as a 13-year old I probably would have run out crying and slept with the covers over my head for a month. In any case, on the whole I thought this was a real solid movie; definitely in the upper tier of the Stephen King adaptations. If any of you don't know, it's about an author (Mike Enslin played by John Cusack) who makes his living staying overnight at supposedly haunted places and then writing about them. He doesn't actually believe in the supernatural and so, when one day he gets a postcard from The Dolphin Hotel in New York that says simply "Don't Go Into 1408", of course he boards the next flight there. Samuel L. Jackson does a great job in a very small part as hotel manager who tries in vain to keep Mike from going into the room. He delivers the single best line in the movie, which I won't ruin here in case anyone plans to see it. Well of course it goes without saying that once Mike gets in the room it doesn't take too long for him to change his mind about the supernatural.
The movie is divided into three distinct acts. The first part introduces us to Mike, gives us a small bit of background on him, and then gets him into the room. The second act takes place in the room, and the third act wraps things up. The first and third acts are both solid, particularly when Jackson is on the screen, but it's the second act that really sets this movie apart. I have to give the director (Mikael Hafstrom) a lot of credit for knowing just how to create an extremely intense 35 minutes of cinema. He knows exactly how far to take you before giving you the "jump scare" or letting the air out and then building it up again. This is not an easy thing to achieve, especially when you are trying to keep things PG-13 (sorry to keep harping on that). He keeps reaching the point where it's about to go over the top and become absolutely terrifying, but he always manages to recede right before the brink in a way that feels like a real relief rather than a copout to the audience. Cusack is good here, too, although this will most likely not go down as one of the roles he's widely remembered for 10 years from now. The key with him is that while his character certainly has problems, he's largely a likeable guy who is given a solid backstory that unfolds slowly throughout the movie. It makes you actually invested in his character and that's what makes it all the worse to see him endure what he goes through.
Anyway, I know I haven't given a lot of specifics, but I think it's better that way. This movie is all about tone and suspense and it does a great job with each. Easily the best horrorish movie of 2007, although considering the competition that's not saying all that much.
Live Free or Die Hard
A very popular discussion to have while tipping back a few pints is "which is the 2nd best Die Hard movie?" Everybody is unanimous that the first one is superior, but opinions are very much divided after that. I am firmly in the Die Hard: With a Vengeance camp. I thought Samuel L. Jackson brought a lot to the movie and I also thought that Jeremy Irons made a great villain. Die Hard 2, on the other hand, I just thought was pretty much the same movie as the first Die Hard, and thus seemed pretty repetitive and unnecessary. That's not to say I won't sit and watch it when I come across it while flipping channels, though. In any case, the real question is will this new Die Hard enter into the discussion as the 2nd or, dare we dream, best Die Hard movie? Um, no. At least not for me. While I still put this one above Die Hard 2, to me it is quite a bit behind Die Hard and With a Vengeance.
Again here I have to bring up the rating. This is the first Die Hard to not be released with an R. I presume that when the studio took a look at the script's action sequence requirements and corresponding budget they wanted to make sure they hit as large an audience as possible. Overall, the movie is just as violent as its predecessors, and the only real difference is that John McClane must have gotten himself a swear jar sometime during the last 12 years and learned to say things like "jerkwad" a lot more. While that doesn't necessarily take away from the movie, there are times when he's speaking to the villains and it just doesn't seem like he's saying what John McClane would really say. I guess that's probably the most general problem with this movie; somehow it just doesn't "feel" like a Die Hard movie. In fact, change the character's name and remove about 3 different lines of dialogue, and this would just be a generic Bruce Willis action movie.
OK, so that's what's "generally" wrong with it. Specifically, there is one glaring problem with this movie and that is with the villain. I won't blame the actor (Timothy Olyphant), but this character is just one of the most bland, boring bad guys to ever appear in a big budget action film. While action movies certainly aren't known for developing 3-dimensional villains too often, this is Die Hard and the ghost of Hans Gruber really bites them here. Alan Rickman gave us one of, if not THE best, action villains of all time and to see such a cookie cutter replacement just shows us how far the series has fallen. The fact that the plot centers around high tech thievery and data manipulation doesn't help matters either. There was a time when the evil villain had a brainy henchman that did the geek-speek so that the main baddy could concentrate on being cool and evil and it just doesn't have the same affect when McClane is essentially hunting down a tech support guy. One of the head henchman (actually a woman) is pretty interesting, but as soon as she gets dispatched of (about halfway through the movie) there's really no one left worth caring about and McClane might as well be shooting at stormtroopers for the rest of the film.
You know, I realize that I am really sounding overly negative about this film and I'm really not intending to. I absolutely enjoyed it and think it's a real fun film. The action sequences are way over the top, but that's a really good thing in a Die Hard film and they are done very well. Also, some kudos to the director (Len Wiseman) for opting to not use CGI; the difference really shows. He also uses some really cool tracking shots during a car chase that some other action movie directors should take notice of. So, overall, a solid although admittedly flawed film that most fans of the series will have fun with but probably not rave about. Had this actually been a generic Bruce Willis movie I probably would have been more forgiving, but that's the double edged sword for the studio. You can't have the hype around a new Die Hard film without raising the expectations.
Transformers
Last night I had the opportunity to see an advanced screening of Transformers. Not only was it free, but it was at the theatre which is only a mile away from our apartment and the theatre was only about half full so we got some great seats. With all that going for me, I should have known my luck would not hold up.
I'm searching for the right words to use here. How about this? This. Movie. Sucks. Yep, I think that about covers it. To any of you out there that are excited to see this movie, all I can say is that the other 5 people who saw it with me all enjoyed it, so I appear to be in the minority here. 20th Century Fox and Michael Bay better hope that I am. For me, the only thing this film successfully transformed was my large Cherry Coke into a gallon of piss.
I'll take the opposite approach of my last review and talk about the good things first. By and large, the transformers look good. Going live action means you are pretty much forced to use CGI, and kudos to the special FX guys for a job well done here. Also, most of the action scenes, especially the one at the end, are pretty cool. And Megan Fox is absolutely smoking hot. Every scene she's in is good just because she's in it; usually with not a lot of clothes on.
So what's wrong with the movie? Everything else. With a run-time of 2 hrs. and 20 minutes, the transformers have maybe 40 minutes of screen time. That means we get 100 minutes of not very interesting story all about the human characters. In the Transformers cartoon, humans were very minor characters. It was all about the war between the machines. Here, it is the other way around. We are forced to follow the humans, and pretty much only see the transformers when they are around the humans. What has Optimus Prime been up to before he appears more than an hour into the movie? We don't know and don't get to find out, but I bet it was a hell of a lot more interesting than the B-movie plot we're forced to sit through. I don't know whether it was a budget constraint or a creative decision to not show more of the Transformers, but the end result is some not very entertaining cinema. The other glaring problem is that (mild spolier alert) Megatron only appears for the last 25 minutes. Why they decided to have the main villain pull a disappearing act for 75% of the film is beyond me, but they did. The other problem is that even though individually the transformers look good, in a battle it's really difficult to tell them apart (with the exception of Optimus Prime). You just see a mess of metal colliding and rolling around and have no idea who you're supposed to root for, so it quickly becomes pretty boring. Finally, again with the exception of Optimus Prime, most of the transformers speak maybe 3 lines in the whole movie. Once more, the transformers are relegated to the background while the humans take front and center. Finally, and most obnoxiously, there is an approximately 25 minute subplot concerning Rachael Taylor and Anthony Anderson's characters that goes absolutely nowhere. And I'm serious; you could completely cut them out of the movie and lose nothing (other than the gratuitous minutes). In a movie that is already pushing the boundaries with its running time this is just completely unacceptable. Even the other people I saw it with that enjoyed it couldn't tell me what the point of this subplot was.
Overall I can't say I was disappointed with this movie, only because from the moment I heard Michale Bay would be directing I instantly had zero expectations of it being good. As Trey Parker and Matt Parker said in Team America "why does Michael Bay get to keep on making movies?" With the exception of The Rock, this guy has had the reverse Midas Touch on everything he has been involved with. And given that somehow his movies continue to make money despite him, I don't see things changing anytime soon.
I'm quite certain that most of you will see Transformers at some point, and some of you will probably even like it and try to convince me that it's good. I'm always open for discussion, but I will only sit down and talk to you about it if you can answer me this: why do the Transformers growl?
1408
It might not be saying much, but this is without a doubt the scariest PG-13 movie I've ever seen. It just goes to show you the oddities of the MPAA ratings criteria. They are always looking for the things you can quantify (i.e. how many uses of profanity, how many total seconds of nudity, and how much blood is shown) that when you get to some ambiguous things like tone and tension they have no idea what to do. So you end up with a film like this, which is far scarier than any Nightmare on Elm Street or Friday the 13th, going out the door with a PG-13 because there's almost no swearing and not a whole lot of blood. All I know is that had I gone to the theatre to see this as a 13-year old I probably would have run out crying and slept with the covers over my head for a month. In any case, on the whole I thought this was a real solid movie; definitely in the upper tier of the Stephen King adaptations. If any of you don't know, it's about an author (Mike Enslin played by John Cusack) who makes his living staying overnight at supposedly haunted places and then writing about them. He doesn't actually believe in the supernatural and so, when one day he gets a postcard from The Dolphin Hotel in New York that says simply "Don't Go Into 1408", of course he boards the next flight there. Samuel L. Jackson does a great job in a very small part as hotel manager who tries in vain to keep Mike from going into the room. He delivers the single best line in the movie, which I won't ruin here in case anyone plans to see it. Well of course it goes without saying that once Mike gets in the room it doesn't take too long for him to change his mind about the supernatural.
The movie is divided into three distinct acts. The first part introduces us to Mike, gives us a small bit of background on him, and then gets him into the room. The second act takes place in the room, and the third act wraps things up. The first and third acts are both solid, particularly when Jackson is on the screen, but it's the second act that really sets this movie apart. I have to give the director (Mikael Hafstrom) a lot of credit for knowing just how to create an extremely intense 35 minutes of cinema. He knows exactly how far to take you before giving you the "jump scare" or letting the air out and then building it up again. This is not an easy thing to achieve, especially when you are trying to keep things PG-13 (sorry to keep harping on that). He keeps reaching the point where it's about to go over the top and become absolutely terrifying, but he always manages to recede right before the brink in a way that feels like a real relief rather than a copout to the audience. Cusack is good here, too, although this will most likely not go down as one of the roles he's widely remembered for 10 years from now. The key with him is that while his character certainly has problems, he's largely a likeable guy who is given a solid backstory that unfolds slowly throughout the movie. It makes you actually invested in his character and that's what makes it all the worse to see him endure what he goes through.
Anyway, I know I haven't given a lot of specifics, but I think it's better that way. This movie is all about tone and suspense and it does a great job with each. Easily the best horrorish movie of 2007, although considering the competition that's not saying all that much.
Live Free or Die Hard
A very popular discussion to have while tipping back a few pints is "which is the 2nd best Die Hard movie?" Everybody is unanimous that the first one is superior, but opinions are very much divided after that. I am firmly in the Die Hard: With a Vengeance camp. I thought Samuel L. Jackson brought a lot to the movie and I also thought that Jeremy Irons made a great villain. Die Hard 2, on the other hand, I just thought was pretty much the same movie as the first Die Hard, and thus seemed pretty repetitive and unnecessary. That's not to say I won't sit and watch it when I come across it while flipping channels, though. In any case, the real question is will this new Die Hard enter into the discussion as the 2nd or, dare we dream, best Die Hard movie? Um, no. At least not for me. While I still put this one above Die Hard 2, to me it is quite a bit behind Die Hard and With a Vengeance.
Again here I have to bring up the rating. This is the first Die Hard to not be released with an R. I presume that when the studio took a look at the script's action sequence requirements and corresponding budget they wanted to make sure they hit as large an audience as possible. Overall, the movie is just as violent as its predecessors, and the only real difference is that John McClane must have gotten himself a swear jar sometime during the last 12 years and learned to say things like "jerkwad" a lot more. While that doesn't necessarily take away from the movie, there are times when he's speaking to the villains and it just doesn't seem like he's saying what John McClane would really say. I guess that's probably the most general problem with this movie; somehow it just doesn't "feel" like a Die Hard movie. In fact, change the character's name and remove about 3 different lines of dialogue, and this would just be a generic Bruce Willis action movie.
OK, so that's what's "generally" wrong with it. Specifically, there is one glaring problem with this movie and that is with the villain. I won't blame the actor (Timothy Olyphant), but this character is just one of the most bland, boring bad guys to ever appear in a big budget action film. While action movies certainly aren't known for developing 3-dimensional villains too often, this is Die Hard and the ghost of Hans Gruber really bites them here. Alan Rickman gave us one of, if not THE best, action villains of all time and to see such a cookie cutter replacement just shows us how far the series has fallen. The fact that the plot centers around high tech thievery and data manipulation doesn't help matters either. There was a time when the evil villain had a brainy henchman that did the geek-speek so that the main baddy could concentrate on being cool and evil and it just doesn't have the same affect when McClane is essentially hunting down a tech support guy. One of the head henchman (actually a woman) is pretty interesting, but as soon as she gets dispatched of (about halfway through the movie) there's really no one left worth caring about and McClane might as well be shooting at stormtroopers for the rest of the film.
You know, I realize that I am really sounding overly negative about this film and I'm really not intending to. I absolutely enjoyed it and think it's a real fun film. The action sequences are way over the top, but that's a really good thing in a Die Hard film and they are done very well. Also, some kudos to the director (Len Wiseman) for opting to not use CGI; the difference really shows. He also uses some really cool tracking shots during a car chase that some other action movie directors should take notice of. So, overall, a solid although admittedly flawed film that most fans of the series will have fun with but probably not rave about. Had this actually been a generic Bruce Willis movie I probably would have been more forgiving, but that's the double edged sword for the studio. You can't have the hype around a new Die Hard film without raising the expectations.
Transformers
Last night I had the opportunity to see an advanced screening of Transformers. Not only was it free, but it was at the theatre which is only a mile away from our apartment and the theatre was only about half full so we got some great seats. With all that going for me, I should have known my luck would not hold up.
I'm searching for the right words to use here. How about this? This. Movie. Sucks. Yep, I think that about covers it. To any of you out there that are excited to see this movie, all I can say is that the other 5 people who saw it with me all enjoyed it, so I appear to be in the minority here. 20th Century Fox and Michael Bay better hope that I am. For me, the only thing this film successfully transformed was my large Cherry Coke into a gallon of piss.
I'll take the opposite approach of my last review and talk about the good things first. By and large, the transformers look good. Going live action means you are pretty much forced to use CGI, and kudos to the special FX guys for a job well done here. Also, most of the action scenes, especially the one at the end, are pretty cool. And Megan Fox is absolutely smoking hot. Every scene she's in is good just because she's in it; usually with not a lot of clothes on.
So what's wrong with the movie? Everything else. With a run-time of 2 hrs. and 20 minutes, the transformers have maybe 40 minutes of screen time. That means we get 100 minutes of not very interesting story all about the human characters. In the Transformers cartoon, humans were very minor characters. It was all about the war between the machines. Here, it is the other way around. We are forced to follow the humans, and pretty much only see the transformers when they are around the humans. What has Optimus Prime been up to before he appears more than an hour into the movie? We don't know and don't get to find out, but I bet it was a hell of a lot more interesting than the B-movie plot we're forced to sit through. I don't know whether it was a budget constraint or a creative decision to not show more of the Transformers, but the end result is some not very entertaining cinema. The other glaring problem is that (mild spolier alert) Megatron only appears for the last 25 minutes. Why they decided to have the main villain pull a disappearing act for 75% of the film is beyond me, but they did. The other problem is that even though individually the transformers look good, in a battle it's really difficult to tell them apart (with the exception of Optimus Prime). You just see a mess of metal colliding and rolling around and have no idea who you're supposed to root for, so it quickly becomes pretty boring. Finally, again with the exception of Optimus Prime, most of the transformers speak maybe 3 lines in the whole movie. Once more, the transformers are relegated to the background while the humans take front and center. Finally, and most obnoxiously, there is an approximately 25 minute subplot concerning Rachael Taylor and Anthony Anderson's characters that goes absolutely nowhere. And I'm serious; you could completely cut them out of the movie and lose nothing (other than the gratuitous minutes). In a movie that is already pushing the boundaries with its running time this is just completely unacceptable. Even the other people I saw it with that enjoyed it couldn't tell me what the point of this subplot was.
Overall I can't say I was disappointed with this movie, only because from the moment I heard Michale Bay would be directing I instantly had zero expectations of it being good. As Trey Parker and Matt Parker said in Team America "why does Michael Bay get to keep on making movies?" With the exception of The Rock, this guy has had the reverse Midas Touch on everything he has been involved with. And given that somehow his movies continue to make money despite him, I don't see things changing anytime soon.
I'm quite certain that most of you will see Transformers at some point, and some of you will probably even like it and try to convince me that it's good. I'm always open for discussion, but I will only sit down and talk to you about it if you can answer me this: why do the Transformers growl?
Monday, June 25, 2007
I Think I'm Now Officially Old
No, not because I just turned 28 or graduated or had any other life-changing event. I believe I am now officially old because of this past Friday night. This was the first weekend in a while that Christy and I had nothing really planned and so we were just going to chill out all weekend long. We ended up deciding that on Friday night we would go out for dinner and then go to Barnes and Noble because we both wanted to pick up some books to read on our Hawaii trip. Now, it's not the act of going to dinner and a bookstore on a Friday night that I think makes me old. It's the fact that I was absolutely, genuinely excited to be doing that rather than anything else. So now I am officially old.
Anyway, as tends to be the case everytime I go to a bookstore I ended up buying way more than I planned. I decided that my summer project is going to be War and Peace, so I bought that. At 1424 pages, if I finish it will become the longest book I've ever read, topping The Stand (1138 pages) and Atlas Shrugged (1096 pages). By all accounts it is a classic and I bought a newer translation that should make it easier to read, but of course anytime you are reading a book that is over 50 years old there is going to be an adjustment period while you find the author's pulse. I also decided that I wanted to get a couple more, shorter, classics to add to my library. I bought Of Mice and Men, Animal Farm, and Lord of the Flies (which I was supposed to have, but never did, read in high school). I've already finished Of Mice and Men (seeing as it's only 107 pages) and I don't have a whole lot to say about it. On one hand, I can see why it's a classic, but on the other hand there's nothing in it that absolutely blew me away. Plus it's Steinbeck, so you know it's going to be depressing as hell going in. I also picked up American Gods, by Neil Gaiman. I'm not sure how exactly it caught my eye but I just picked it up and started reading it in the cafe area and couldn't put it down. I'm now on page 102 and it keeps getting better. I had intended to go back to the Einstein bio after this weekend but I guess that'll just have to wait. Finally, I picked up two non-fiction books. One is called The Philosopher's Handbook and is just a collection of western philosophy writings pretty much from Socrates through Nietzche. I've always enjoyed philosophy but don't have the time to read 50 different books to get a well-rounded education in the subject, so it's nice to have them all compiled in one place so I can at least get a taste of them. The other book I bought is a zen book called Not Always So. It is a collection of speeches given by Zen master Suzuki (who died in the 70s). I have his other book (Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind) and really enjoyed that, so thought I'd pick this one up since I have been looking to get back into Zen and Buddhism. On a related note, I decided to take an introductory meditation course at the Buddhist temple up in Lakeview. It's 5 Tuesdays for an hour and a half each week and starts July 17th, right after we get back from Hawaii. I'm excited to do it; it's something I've been meaning to do for a long time.
In other news, I was very happy to see a story on yahoo news this morning. A while ago, I posted about some insane judge that was suing a dry cleaners for $54 million for temporarily losing his pants. Well, the case was finally resolved today in favor of the dry cleaners (http://tinyurl.com/ywmc8v), so at least some form of common sense prevailed in the end. The judge has also been ordered to pay their court costs, although the matter of their legal fees is still being decided.
On the marathon front, I got off to a rough start at the beginning of last week. On Tuesday night at 9:40 I was all set to head out and do my 4 miles, when I suddenly remembered that the fitness center was now operating under summer hours and closed at 10. In theory I could have just done my running outside but, well, I didn't. I did end up rebounding nicely, though, by running 5 miles on Thursday (1 hour); 4 miles on Saturday (46:30), and 6 miles yesterday (71:57) for a total of 15 for the week. I realized after I ran yesterday that it was the first time in my life I have ever run 6 miles without stopping. I have actually run 10ks before, and run them faster than 72 minutes, but it was always a combo of running and walking. This week I have pretty much the same routine to look forward to, except I have a 7-miler on Sunday. It's starting to get serious now. If I can eventualy get up to doing 10 miles at a 12 minute mile pace without stopping, I'll be really happy.
Christy and I are going to Second City this Thursday night, and then the Cubs game on Friday afternoon. At present I'm excited about both of them, but of course my excitement for the Cubs always hinges on how they do the preceding day.
Anyway, as tends to be the case everytime I go to a bookstore I ended up buying way more than I planned. I decided that my summer project is going to be War and Peace, so I bought that. At 1424 pages, if I finish it will become the longest book I've ever read, topping The Stand (1138 pages) and Atlas Shrugged (1096 pages). By all accounts it is a classic and I bought a newer translation that should make it easier to read, but of course anytime you are reading a book that is over 50 years old there is going to be an adjustment period while you find the author's pulse. I also decided that I wanted to get a couple more, shorter, classics to add to my library. I bought Of Mice and Men, Animal Farm, and Lord of the Flies (which I was supposed to have, but never did, read in high school). I've already finished Of Mice and Men (seeing as it's only 107 pages) and I don't have a whole lot to say about it. On one hand, I can see why it's a classic, but on the other hand there's nothing in it that absolutely blew me away. Plus it's Steinbeck, so you know it's going to be depressing as hell going in. I also picked up American Gods, by Neil Gaiman. I'm not sure how exactly it caught my eye but I just picked it up and started reading it in the cafe area and couldn't put it down. I'm now on page 102 and it keeps getting better. I had intended to go back to the Einstein bio after this weekend but I guess that'll just have to wait. Finally, I picked up two non-fiction books. One is called The Philosopher's Handbook and is just a collection of western philosophy writings pretty much from Socrates through Nietzche. I've always enjoyed philosophy but don't have the time to read 50 different books to get a well-rounded education in the subject, so it's nice to have them all compiled in one place so I can at least get a taste of them. The other book I bought is a zen book called Not Always So. It is a collection of speeches given by Zen master Suzuki (who died in the 70s). I have his other book (Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind) and really enjoyed that, so thought I'd pick this one up since I have been looking to get back into Zen and Buddhism. On a related note, I decided to take an introductory meditation course at the Buddhist temple up in Lakeview. It's 5 Tuesdays for an hour and a half each week and starts July 17th, right after we get back from Hawaii. I'm excited to do it; it's something I've been meaning to do for a long time.
In other news, I was very happy to see a story on yahoo news this morning. A while ago, I posted about some insane judge that was suing a dry cleaners for $54 million for temporarily losing his pants. Well, the case was finally resolved today in favor of the dry cleaners (http://tinyurl.com/ywmc8v), so at least some form of common sense prevailed in the end. The judge has also been ordered to pay their court costs, although the matter of their legal fees is still being decided.
On the marathon front, I got off to a rough start at the beginning of last week. On Tuesday night at 9:40 I was all set to head out and do my 4 miles, when I suddenly remembered that the fitness center was now operating under summer hours and closed at 10. In theory I could have just done my running outside but, well, I didn't. I did end up rebounding nicely, though, by running 5 miles on Thursday (1 hour); 4 miles on Saturday (46:30), and 6 miles yesterday (71:57) for a total of 15 for the week. I realized after I ran yesterday that it was the first time in my life I have ever run 6 miles without stopping. I have actually run 10ks before, and run them faster than 72 minutes, but it was always a combo of running and walking. This week I have pretty much the same routine to look forward to, except I have a 7-miler on Sunday. It's starting to get serious now. If I can eventualy get up to doing 10 miles at a 12 minute mile pace without stopping, I'll be really happy.
Christy and I are going to Second City this Thursday night, and then the Cubs game on Friday afternoon. At present I'm excited about both of them, but of course my excitement for the Cubs always hinges on how they do the preceding day.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Quick Update
Not a lot to say today. Trying to run the clock out on my last few hours of work before I take off for a 4-day weekend. I'm definitely looking forward to it, but won't get much chance for relaxation, except for tonight. Christy and I are going to Smith and Wollensky for dinner tonight to celebrate her being done with teaching. I've never been there but I hear it's one of the best steakhouses around and it's right on the Chicago river. Of course, with this being sandwiched in between going out for my birthday last Sunday (at another great steakhouse, the Chicago Chophouse) and my graduation this Sunday we certainly are doing a lot of celebrating lately. Not that that's a bad thing (unless you're speaking in terms of a hit to our bank account). In any case, we're planning to see Ocean's 13 after that. I hated Ocean's 12 so I am not expecting all that much, but hopefully it is at least entertaining. The rest of the weekend is going to be tied up with family and graduation-related activities, so I'm sure it will pass by in a blur. I'm glad I have Monday off so I can just lay on the couch all day and recover.
On the marathon front, my "official" training schedule is about to begin next week. To kind of kickstart it, I actually decided that I would go ahead and do week 1 this week (and then repeat it next week) as sort of a practice week. Tuesday I ran 4 miles on the treadmill in 47 minutes, and then this morning (thanks to the aforementioned dinner plans) I got up at 6:00 and did an hour run on the treadmill (going about 5.1 miles). I can't even believe I have already been up for 11 hours. Hopefully I don't fall asleep during the movie, but a big meal is certainly not going to help me out in that capacity. I'm supposed to run 4 miles on Saturday and then 6 on Sunday. While I can probably make time on Saturday I see absolutely no chance that Sunday is going to happen. Good thing this is only practice!
I saw Pirates of the Caribbean and Knocked Up last week. Knocked Up was pretty good; nothing fantastic, but a solidly made romantic comedy. It's one of those rare movies you can go to on a date where one person isn't dreading the experience. Pirates was very mediocre. The name of the sequel is "At World's End" but I think a more appropriate title would have been "Let's Make a Deal." Pretty much the entirety of the first two hours has 2 of the 6 or 7 major characters (in seemingly random order) making deals with each other that everyone knows they're not going to keep, then predictably breaking the deal and making a new one with the next character while saying "I never break a deal." When it finally does get around to the action sequences, they are pretty good. Instead of the 3-way swordfight (does that sound gay?) on top of a rolling wheel (the single coolest part of the second one, IMO) we get a 30-minute duel between two ships as they are being sucked into a whirlpool (also called, as I learned from the film, a maelstrom). I heard some people didn't care for it, but it worked for me. It was the 2 hours I had to put up with en route to that which lowered my enjoyment. I mean, when did Hollywood decide that their "fun" summer movies all had to be over 2 and a half hours long. I understand wanting to give people their money's worth, but there is also such a thing as addition by subtraction. That's what you pay the gentleman at the studio with the scissors for.
I am excited to see 1408 next weekend. I love John Cusack, Samuel L Jackson, Stephen King, and horror/mysteries so it seems like it should be a can't miss. Of course, Stephen King adaptations always turn out be either excellent (The Green Mile, Shawshank Redemption, and The Shining for example) or abysmal (Dreamcatcher, The Dark Half, and Needful Things come to mind). Let's hope this one is closer to the former than the latter.
I am currently reading the new bio on Albert Einstein (Einstein: His Life and Universe) and so far it is very engaging. I'll probably end up posting a full review of it once I finish, as I can't imagine I'll have anything more interesting to talk about.
Still waiting for my "official" grades to come in on my last two classes. Hope I really am graduating this weekend.
On the marathon front, my "official" training schedule is about to begin next week. To kind of kickstart it, I actually decided that I would go ahead and do week 1 this week (and then repeat it next week) as sort of a practice week. Tuesday I ran 4 miles on the treadmill in 47 minutes, and then this morning (thanks to the aforementioned dinner plans) I got up at 6:00 and did an hour run on the treadmill (going about 5.1 miles). I can't even believe I have already been up for 11 hours. Hopefully I don't fall asleep during the movie, but a big meal is certainly not going to help me out in that capacity. I'm supposed to run 4 miles on Saturday and then 6 on Sunday. While I can probably make time on Saturday I see absolutely no chance that Sunday is going to happen. Good thing this is only practice!
I saw Pirates of the Caribbean and Knocked Up last week. Knocked Up was pretty good; nothing fantastic, but a solidly made romantic comedy. It's one of those rare movies you can go to on a date where one person isn't dreading the experience. Pirates was very mediocre. The name of the sequel is "At World's End" but I think a more appropriate title would have been "Let's Make a Deal." Pretty much the entirety of the first two hours has 2 of the 6 or 7 major characters (in seemingly random order) making deals with each other that everyone knows they're not going to keep, then predictably breaking the deal and making a new one with the next character while saying "I never break a deal." When it finally does get around to the action sequences, they are pretty good. Instead of the 3-way swordfight (does that sound gay?) on top of a rolling wheel (the single coolest part of the second one, IMO) we get a 30-minute duel between two ships as they are being sucked into a whirlpool (also called, as I learned from the film, a maelstrom). I heard some people didn't care for it, but it worked for me. It was the 2 hours I had to put up with en route to that which lowered my enjoyment. I mean, when did Hollywood decide that their "fun" summer movies all had to be over 2 and a half hours long. I understand wanting to give people their money's worth, but there is also such a thing as addition by subtraction. That's what you pay the gentleman at the studio with the scissors for.
I am excited to see 1408 next weekend. I love John Cusack, Samuel L Jackson, Stephen King, and horror/mysteries so it seems like it should be a can't miss. Of course, Stephen King adaptations always turn out be either excellent (The Green Mile, Shawshank Redemption, and The Shining for example) or abysmal (Dreamcatcher, The Dark Half, and Needful Things come to mind). Let's hope this one is closer to the former than the latter.
I am currently reading the new bio on Albert Einstein (Einstein: His Life and Universe) and so far it is very engaging. I'll probably end up posting a full review of it once I finish, as I can't imagine I'll have anything more interesting to talk about.
Still waiting for my "official" grades to come in on my last two classes. Hope I really am graduating this weekend.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Done!
I’ll say right up front that this is an introspective post. That’s the more sophisticated way of saying “I’m about to embark on an ego trip and just talk about me.” You’ve been warned.
Some afternoon in early 2005 as we were in the midst of wedding planning madness, Christy and I found ourselves just generally discussing how we saw our future over the next couple years after the wedding. The subject of my MBA came up. “Let’s be honest,” she said, “you’ve pretty much given up on it, haven’t you?” I couldn’t disagree with her. It had been over a year since I’d taken a class towards my MBA, and I’d taken a whopping 2 in the year before that. An average of 1 class per year wasn’t gonna cut it, unless I was able to talk Depaul into putting me on the 15-year plan. I had registered for classes a couple times in the interim, but my travel schedule at work kept forcing me to drop. That situation didn’t seem likely to improve anytime soon either. Reluctantly, I conceded, “Yeah, I pretty much have.”
Now, a little over 2 years later, much has changed. Last night, barring some sort of catastrophic performance on my final, my just-shy-of-6-years' campaign to get a masters degree came to a successful conclusion.
So what changed between then and now? Well, a whole lot of things but it can probably best be summed up in one word: Hawaii. I’m sure most of you have been subjected to the ramblings from Christy and I that it is our dream to temporarily relocate to Hawaii for a few years. Whether or not that actually happens (and the odds seem to change from month to month and sometimes day to day) it is undoubtedly true that Hawaii has had a major impact on our lives. Not only did we get the vacation of a lifetime and the memories of that, but the idea of moving there led me to think seriously about what the best way to accomplish that would be. Since my work experience is in auditing, that seemed to be the only realistic way I could make enough money to support an existence in Hawaii. Getting an auditing job in Hawaii meant working for one of the Big Four accounting firms. Getting in there meant getting my CPA. Getting my CPA meant taking more accounting classes. Taking more accounting classes meant I might as well finish my MBA. But that’s just half the domino effect that occurred over the 6 months after our honeymoon. I quickly realized that taking classes was still not going to be feasible given the workload at my current job. So that led me to look elsewhere and eventually landed me at Blue Cross Blue Shield. And once I was working downtown, we figured that we might as well live there as well, so that led to us relocating from Palatine into the city. I sometimes think about all of this and wonder, “would any of this have happened if we had decided to take our honeymoon in the Caribbean instead?” Just goes to show you that you don’t always know when you are making a decision that will have a huge impact on your life.
I still remember walking from BCBS over to the Depaul loop campus on a Monday night last March. It was my first time attending class in almost 2 years. I had already done the math and knew I needed 8 classes to graduate. At 11 meetings per class, that meant 88 occasions that I would have to go directly from work over to class. At 3 hours per class, that meant 264 hours of trying to stay awake through lectures. I haven’t kept a running total throughout, but I have recalculated after pretty much every quarter. This last quarter I had a big red number written on every class day counting down to “1”. It felt awesome to cross that last one off when I walked into work this morning. I am happy to report that out of those 88 classes, I missed only 2. They were both for the same class too; once because it was the day after the Super Bowl, and once because we had just flown in from Phoenix 2 hours before class started. That means that I had perfect attendance in 7 of my last 8 classes. In the entirety of my undergrad, I had exactly 1 class with perfect attendance. While my grades this quarter are still pending, so far I have gotten all A’s in the first 6 classes and I’m hopeful that trend will continue with these last two. If it does, I will be graduating with a 3.79 GPA. Hey, I warned you that this was gonna be an ego trip didn’t I? As some comedy, I was looking through a grade report the other day. The worst grade I received in grad school was a B- in the one and only finance class I took. The humorous part is that my bachelor degree is in Finance. Whoops!
So how does it feel to be done? Well, since I spent pretty much all of my free time Monday, Tuesday, and early Wednesday studying and then stayed up till 2 last night celebrating, right now it just feels tired. As I have found to be the case with most long-term things, it takes a while to sink in once it's finally over so I know the full force hasn't really hit me yet. I do know that overall I am more proud of getting this degree than my undergrad. Not because I think it's more prestigious or anything, but because I feel like I worked harder, learned more, and really truly earned this one. Then there's also just the fact of how much longer it took me to complete this. All told, I was only at U of I for 3 years and 4 months while my time at Depaul stretched from 9/01 - 6/07. So, basically, it took me 2 and a half years longer. But probably the biggest part of it is this overriding feeling that this degree was all for me. Certainly, the undergrad was "for me" as well, but there was a certain element where it just felt like it was the next step after high school rather than a conscious decision I was making about my future. But deciding to go to grad school was completely my decision; there were no expectations for me to do it and no pressure to keep going once I started other than the pressure I put on myself. It feels really gratifying to have set a long-term goal for myself and achieved it on my own (with the exception of some monetary assistance from Kemper, HSBC, and BCBS).
So now I am done and left wondering, “OK, what next?” Well, I am looking no further than 29 days from now when Christy and I are heading back to Hawaii for 8 days. Beyond that, I’ll worry about the rest in September.
Here the ego trip ends.
Some afternoon in early 2005 as we were in the midst of wedding planning madness, Christy and I found ourselves just generally discussing how we saw our future over the next couple years after the wedding. The subject of my MBA came up. “Let’s be honest,” she said, “you’ve pretty much given up on it, haven’t you?” I couldn’t disagree with her. It had been over a year since I’d taken a class towards my MBA, and I’d taken a whopping 2 in the year before that. An average of 1 class per year wasn’t gonna cut it, unless I was able to talk Depaul into putting me on the 15-year plan. I had registered for classes a couple times in the interim, but my travel schedule at work kept forcing me to drop. That situation didn’t seem likely to improve anytime soon either. Reluctantly, I conceded, “Yeah, I pretty much have.”
Now, a little over 2 years later, much has changed. Last night, barring some sort of catastrophic performance on my final, my just-shy-of-6-years' campaign to get a masters degree came to a successful conclusion.
So what changed between then and now? Well, a whole lot of things but it can probably best be summed up in one word: Hawaii. I’m sure most of you have been subjected to the ramblings from Christy and I that it is our dream to temporarily relocate to Hawaii for a few years. Whether or not that actually happens (and the odds seem to change from month to month and sometimes day to day) it is undoubtedly true that Hawaii has had a major impact on our lives. Not only did we get the vacation of a lifetime and the memories of that, but the idea of moving there led me to think seriously about what the best way to accomplish that would be. Since my work experience is in auditing, that seemed to be the only realistic way I could make enough money to support an existence in Hawaii. Getting an auditing job in Hawaii meant working for one of the Big Four accounting firms. Getting in there meant getting my CPA. Getting my CPA meant taking more accounting classes. Taking more accounting classes meant I might as well finish my MBA. But that’s just half the domino effect that occurred over the 6 months after our honeymoon. I quickly realized that taking classes was still not going to be feasible given the workload at my current job. So that led me to look elsewhere and eventually landed me at Blue Cross Blue Shield. And once I was working downtown, we figured that we might as well live there as well, so that led to us relocating from Palatine into the city. I sometimes think about all of this and wonder, “would any of this have happened if we had decided to take our honeymoon in the Caribbean instead?” Just goes to show you that you don’t always know when you are making a decision that will have a huge impact on your life.
I still remember walking from BCBS over to the Depaul loop campus on a Monday night last March. It was my first time attending class in almost 2 years. I had already done the math and knew I needed 8 classes to graduate. At 11 meetings per class, that meant 88 occasions that I would have to go directly from work over to class. At 3 hours per class, that meant 264 hours of trying to stay awake through lectures. I haven’t kept a running total throughout, but I have recalculated after pretty much every quarter. This last quarter I had a big red number written on every class day counting down to “1”. It felt awesome to cross that last one off when I walked into work this morning. I am happy to report that out of those 88 classes, I missed only 2. They were both for the same class too; once because it was the day after the Super Bowl, and once because we had just flown in from Phoenix 2 hours before class started. That means that I had perfect attendance in 7 of my last 8 classes. In the entirety of my undergrad, I had exactly 1 class with perfect attendance. While my grades this quarter are still pending, so far I have gotten all A’s in the first 6 classes and I’m hopeful that trend will continue with these last two. If it does, I will be graduating with a 3.79 GPA. Hey, I warned you that this was gonna be an ego trip didn’t I? As some comedy, I was looking through a grade report the other day. The worst grade I received in grad school was a B- in the one and only finance class I took. The humorous part is that my bachelor degree is in Finance. Whoops!
So how does it feel to be done? Well, since I spent pretty much all of my free time Monday, Tuesday, and early Wednesday studying and then stayed up till 2 last night celebrating, right now it just feels tired. As I have found to be the case with most long-term things, it takes a while to sink in once it's finally over so I know the full force hasn't really hit me yet. I do know that overall I am more proud of getting this degree than my undergrad. Not because I think it's more prestigious or anything, but because I feel like I worked harder, learned more, and really truly earned this one. Then there's also just the fact of how much longer it took me to complete this. All told, I was only at U of I for 3 years and 4 months while my time at Depaul stretched from 9/01 - 6/07. So, basically, it took me 2 and a half years longer. But probably the biggest part of it is this overriding feeling that this degree was all for me. Certainly, the undergrad was "for me" as well, but there was a certain element where it just felt like it was the next step after high school rather than a conscious decision I was making about my future. But deciding to go to grad school was completely my decision; there were no expectations for me to do it and no pressure to keep going once I started other than the pressure I put on myself. It feels really gratifying to have set a long-term goal for myself and achieved it on my own (with the exception of some monetary assistance from Kemper, HSBC, and BCBS).
So now I am done and left wondering, “OK, what next?” Well, I am looking no further than 29 days from now when Christy and I are heading back to Hawaii for 8 days. Beyond that, I’ll worry about the rest in September.
Here the ego trip ends.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Obligatory "I Haven't Posted in 2 Weeks" Post
So I don't have an awful lot to say but feel an obligation to add something after two weeks of silence. Maybe the curse of writing about Paris Hilton has given me writer's block. But probably it's just that I've had my hands full with school and work and haven't had much of interest to say. I have class all day tomorrow and then one more lecture on Wednesday and then final the following Wednesday and that will do it. Can't wait to get to June 6th so I can celebrate, but there's still a fair amount of work to be done till then.
This weekend is crammed full of sibling-tastic action! My older brother Mike is in town and Christy and I will be showing him, his wife, and my four nieces and nephews around the city after class on Saturday. Then they are all crashing at our place. Yep, there will be a total of 8 people sleeping in our one bedroom apartment (cue circus clown music). Then on Sunday we are off to my Dad's for my other brother Joe's (aka Mooney) college graduation party. Having a younger sibling graduate from college really makes me feel old. At least I'm staying a degree ahead of him though. Then on Monday we are heading out to Christy's P's place for her brother Mike's birthday. Things don't slow down after the weekend, though. Tuesday night I'm going to the Cubs game and then Wednesday night I have class. Of course, right after that I will need to start studying for my final. Well, I guess the good news is that the next couple weeks should fly by. In other words, don't be surprised if there's another conspicuous absence of posts for a while.
I ran in the Chase Corporate Challenge last night. 3 and a half miles through the streets around Grant Park. In the words of my dad, "it's a crap race." It's just not very well organized and it's such a cluster, since you have serious runners, non-serious runners, and walkers all mixed in and starting at the same time. For the first 2 miles there's no sense of pacing; you alternate between running as fast as you can whenever you can and being bunched up in a huge pack of people at a walking pace. Nevertheless, I was pretty happy with my time (37:32); especially considering that it took me at least a minute and a half to cross the starting line so my real time was probably closer to 36:00. This was the first (and by far the easiest) of my 3 "warm-up" races. The next one is a 10-miler in late July; then the half-marathon in mid-August. I'll get a much better sense for how realistic running the marathon is after those.
I did have some time to finish a couple quick reads that I can heartily recommend for anyone looking for something they can get through on a plane ride or a weekend at the beach. First I read Lewis Black's book "Nothing Sacred" and it's a lot different than you'd expect (if you are familiar with his stand-up). While he certainly mixes-in some of his material it's mainly a bio and he's a lot more of a softy than you'd ever expect from listening to his rants. He's pretty much the epitomy of the "all bark with no bite" type of personality, and I don't mean that as a negative at all. Overall, there's nothing phenomenal about the book, but he's lived a pretty interesting life in a pretty interesting time and he's presented it in a very cohesive, fluid, humorouos way.
The other book I read was Bob Harris' "Prisoner of Trebekistan." It's about his experiences on Jeopardy! but is much more interesting than that probably makes it sound. There's a lot of info about the behind-the-scenes stuff (some psyching out but mainly more of a Mensa-type fraternity of really smart people) and also gives some insight into what Alex Trebek is really like (a really nice guy who is unfailingly professional). Finally, he also gives some good tips on how to memorize long lists of things in an easy way and make it stick. After reading the book I used his ideas and memorized all the U.S. Presidents in order (you can quiz me next time you see me) and it only took me about an hour. I also have learned all the South American, African, and Asian countries, though I don't know exactly where they all are on the map yet. I might tackle the Vice Presidents or all the country capitals next. Useless knowledge is fun! Anyway, pretty much the same things that applied to the Lewis Black book apply here, though I have to say that this is a better book. Though it gets a little preachy about some things at times, to me it never went over the top, and there is humor throughout. In fact, a couple of the jokes he sets up and pays off so beautifully I literally had to put the book down because I was laughing so hard. But then again, I'm a huge dork.
Have a good Memorial Day everyone!
This weekend is crammed full of sibling-tastic action! My older brother Mike is in town and Christy and I will be showing him, his wife, and my four nieces and nephews around the city after class on Saturday. Then they are all crashing at our place. Yep, there will be a total of 8 people sleeping in our one bedroom apartment (cue circus clown music). Then on Sunday we are off to my Dad's for my other brother Joe's (aka Mooney) college graduation party. Having a younger sibling graduate from college really makes me feel old. At least I'm staying a degree ahead of him though. Then on Monday we are heading out to Christy's P's place for her brother Mike's birthday. Things don't slow down after the weekend, though. Tuesday night I'm going to the Cubs game and then Wednesday night I have class. Of course, right after that I will need to start studying for my final. Well, I guess the good news is that the next couple weeks should fly by. In other words, don't be surprised if there's another conspicuous absence of posts for a while.
I ran in the Chase Corporate Challenge last night. 3 and a half miles through the streets around Grant Park. In the words of my dad, "it's a crap race." It's just not very well organized and it's such a cluster, since you have serious runners, non-serious runners, and walkers all mixed in and starting at the same time. For the first 2 miles there's no sense of pacing; you alternate between running as fast as you can whenever you can and being bunched up in a huge pack of people at a walking pace. Nevertheless, I was pretty happy with my time (37:32); especially considering that it took me at least a minute and a half to cross the starting line so my real time was probably closer to 36:00. This was the first (and by far the easiest) of my 3 "warm-up" races. The next one is a 10-miler in late July; then the half-marathon in mid-August. I'll get a much better sense for how realistic running the marathon is after those.
I did have some time to finish a couple quick reads that I can heartily recommend for anyone looking for something they can get through on a plane ride or a weekend at the beach. First I read Lewis Black's book "Nothing Sacred" and it's a lot different than you'd expect (if you are familiar with his stand-up). While he certainly mixes-in some of his material it's mainly a bio and he's a lot more of a softy than you'd ever expect from listening to his rants. He's pretty much the epitomy of the "all bark with no bite" type of personality, and I don't mean that as a negative at all. Overall, there's nothing phenomenal about the book, but he's lived a pretty interesting life in a pretty interesting time and he's presented it in a very cohesive, fluid, humorouos way.
The other book I read was Bob Harris' "Prisoner of Trebekistan." It's about his experiences on Jeopardy! but is much more interesting than that probably makes it sound. There's a lot of info about the behind-the-scenes stuff (some psyching out but mainly more of a Mensa-type fraternity of really smart people) and also gives some insight into what Alex Trebek is really like (a really nice guy who is unfailingly professional). Finally, he also gives some good tips on how to memorize long lists of things in an easy way and make it stick. After reading the book I used his ideas and memorized all the U.S. Presidents in order (you can quiz me next time you see me) and it only took me about an hour. I also have learned all the South American, African, and Asian countries, though I don't know exactly where they all are on the map yet. I might tackle the Vice Presidents or all the country capitals next. Useless knowledge is fun! Anyway, pretty much the same things that applied to the Lewis Black book apply here, though I have to say that this is a better book. Though it gets a little preachy about some things at times, to me it never went over the top, and there is humor throughout. In fact, a couple of the jokes he sets up and pays off so beautifully I literally had to put the book down because I was laughing so hard. But then again, I'm a huge dork.
Have a good Memorial Day everyone!
Friday, May 11, 2007
Delusional
de·lu·sion
- an act or instance of deluding.
- the state of being deluded.
- a false belief or opinion: delusions of grandeur.
- Psychiatry. a fixed false belief that is resistant to reason or confrontation with actual fact: a paranoid delusion.
This week I’ll return to some lighthearted fare. I read two stories this past week that caught my eye, both of which I view with a certain amount of contempt and left me shaking my head after I read them. However, while I have no problem lampooning one, I am borderline ashamed to even discuss the other. First, a man is suing a husband & wife-owned dry-cleaning service for losing a pair of pants. He wants $65 million for his troubles. Second, Paris Hilton is (hopefully) going to jail. Use your intuition to figure out which one I’m ashamed to bring up. I wasn’t planning to make this definition intro a recurring theme (and still am not), but I was unable to read either of these stories without hearing the word “delusional” over and over again in my head. I didn’t mind, though. Frankly, it was a nice break from the voice that’s always telling me to start fires.
First things first. You can read all about the absurdity of the man suing over a $65 million dollar pair of pants here: http://tinyurl.com/2p97gy. Now I know that there are an enormous amount of frivolous lawsuits filed every day in this country, but there are a few things that make this situation unique. The main one is that the man who is suing is himself a judge. That means that someone whose main job requirement is to know the law and remain fair and impartial has determined that his is a reasonable action. The other astounding thing is that this case has been going on for two years; it wasn’t simply reviewed once and tossed out immediately, as most reasonable people would think would happen.
To summarize for those that don’t feel like reading it, in 2005 this judge brought in a pair of pants to have alterations done. When he came back two days later, they told him they had misplaced his pants. They eventually found them, two days later, but then the judge claimed that those weren’t his pants, even though they matched his measurements and the ticket numbers. So since then he has been pressing this suit, and perhaps the only thing more ridiculous than his actions is the creativity that has been involved in coming up with the figure of $65 million. Since he doesn’t want to go back to that dry cleaners anymore, he believes he is entitled to the cost of renting a car every weekend for 10 years to go to another dry cleaners. While that in itself seems pretty ridiculous, that only comes to a paltry $15,000. The bulk of the rest comes from his allegation that the cleaners have been in violation of 12 consumer protection laws (doesn’t specify which ones) since they opened (1200 days ago) and at $1500 per violation, per day, per defendant (3) that comes to a cool $64.8 million. I will repeat: This man is an active judge! There are people that come before him in court every day and he decides their punishment. Think you have any chance of talking your way out of a speeding ticket in this guy’s court? Hardly. You’d probably be lucky if he didn’t give you the death penalty along with all your blood relatives and anyone you’ve ever spoken more than 15 words to, just to make an example out of you.
Listen, I understand how the legal system works. Really, I do. I understand the concept of punitive damages that are designed to go above and beyond the actual harm caused to serve as a deterrent. But following the letter of the law shouldn’t mean that we abandon common sense. For those having trouble deciphering where the line is in this case, let me just offer this guideline: when you are making the woman who sued McDonald’s for $3 million after spilling hot coffee on herself look reasonable, you have gone too far.
Now we come to Paris, and I know that there is way too much said about her already. I know that giving this attention, even in a derogatory way, is still giving attention to something that doesn’t deserve it. I further know that there are approximately 9.7 billion topics (I counted) that are more worthy of discussion than this one. I know all of this. And yet I can’t help myself. Not after I read the petition. It’s just too damn funny, and I have to say something about it. For those of you that haven’t heard (and if you haven’t please let me know, as I wish to emulate your life in every possible way) Ms. Paris Hilton has recently been sentenced to 45 days in jail in connection with a probation violation stemming from her DUI arrest last year. As part of the original deal, her license was suspended through March of this year. Yet she was pulled over on January 15th; she was actually let go by the police after signing a document specifying that she had a suspended license and was not to drive. A month later, she was pulled over again and this time was charged with violating probation.
All that’s just the set-up. Here are the punchlines (and there are a lot of them). At her hearing, her first defense is that her publicist misinformed her by telling her that her license was only suspended for 30 days. I guess in the fantasy world of Hollywoodland, “My publicist didn’t tell me” is a valid, legally admissible defense. It may shock Ms. Hilton to know that there are actually people that exist in the world who manage to know the details of their life (or at least the important ones) even when their publicist doesn’t tell them what they are. And I would think that if you had an IQ that was just slightly higher than your shoe size, after getting out of court the first time a little voice would sound in your head that would say “You just got probation. First, go look that word up. Then, figure out what it means you have to do and not do.” I would further think that you might be better served having someone besides your publicist explain it to you. Like, say, maybe the gentleman with the law degree that you sit next to in the court room and pay all this money to. Her second defense is that when she was stopped in January, informed that she was driving on a suspended license, and forced to sign a sheet saying as much, she “thought the officer was mistaken” and “didn’t really read the document.” So, again, when there is a discrepancy between what the nice gentleman with the uniform and the gun tells you and what you remember your publicist saying, the infallibility of the publicist wins out. I believe, in legalese, this is known as the “It’s Really a Miracle I Can Even Dress Myself” defense. Astoundingly, the judge at the hearing decides this ironclad defense is somehow lacking, and sentences her to 45 days in jail.
Clearly, this is a travesty of justice. And whenever famous people feel slighted, thousands of people living a vicarious existence with far too much time on their hands are going to circulate a petition. And it was after reading this petition to Gov. Schwarzenegger (it still cracks me up to say or write that) that I felt compelled to write this, because it is a document that is so filled with non-reality that the word “delusional” just falls short. There frankly isn’t a word that I know of to describe it. To come close, just stare vacantly into space and start convulsing and drooling on yourself while making a series of increasingly louder clucking noises (extra points for you if you do this while at work).
You can read the whole petition here: http://tinyurl.com/27jshj. Here are just a few of my favorite lines. “She (Paris) provides beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives.” Yes, where would we all be without Paris Hilton? I believe that most of the problems in Iraq stem from the fact that their cable provider doesn’t broadcast The Simple Life. “In addition to her work as an actress, she has achieved some recognition as a model, celebrity spokesperson, singer, and writer.” And I have received some recognition as a singer, writer, auditor, student, wandering minstrel, and shirtless drunk guy. Not a lot, mind you, but some. “We, the American public who support Paris, are shocked, dismayed and appalled by how Paris has been the person to be used as an example that Drunk Driving is wrong.” Yeah! It is absolutely appalling to dole out punishment for driving drunk. And anyway, clearly someone poor, ugly, and with a mustache and a wife-beater tee should be the one to be made an example of. Also, contrary to popular belief drunk driving is in fact not a proper noun and doesn't require capitalization. Might want to have someone in 4th grade give your petition a quick read through before you send it on to the governor. “Brandy's California Highway accident, although no proof of DUI was evidenced in her accident, resulting in the death of a young wife and mother in California, yet Brandy walks free as of today, never doing any time and A WOMAN HAS BEEN KILLED most likely due to her reckless driving!” And just a few weeks ago, a woman in Chicago filed a lawsuit against her partner for “negligent dancing.” I mean, as long as we’re bringing up legal precedents that have nothing to do with the current case, I just thought I’d share that. This last one’s my favorite, though. “If the late Former President Gerald Ford could find it in his heart to pardon the late Former President Richard Nixon after his mistake(s), we undeniably support Paris Hilton being pardoned for her honest mistake as well.” See, Gov. Schwarzenegger, play your cards right and you just might up the next Gerald Ford! And furthermore, I can think of no better way to solicit sympathy from the public and elected officials than to compare yourself to Richard Nixon.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Ambivalence
am·biv·a·lence – noun
- uncertainty or fluctuation, esp. when caused by inability to make a choice or by a simultaneous desire to say or do two opposite or conflicting things.
- Psychology. the coexistence within an individual of positive and negative feelings toward the same person, object, or action, simultaneously drawing him or her in opposite directions.
Well, I’ll just say right off the bat that this will be the first serious piece I’ve written in a while, as it is about the Virginia Tech shooting. Those of you who feel like you’ve heard more than enough about this incident over the past 2 weeks are certainly forgiven for not wanting to read this. Just wanted to get that out of the way.
Whenever something like this happens, the question everyone wants answered is “why?” That’s certainly not an easy thing to answer; pretty much by definition anyone who decides to go on a killing spree is operating with a mind that, to say the least, is not functioning like a “normal” person’s. Thus, any attempt to dissect and follow his train of thought logically is bound to be frustrating and probably fruitless. Of course, that doesn’t stop us from trying. One of the things that separates this from a lot of the other school and workplace shootings in recent years is that this time you didn’t hear a lot of “he seemed so normal; we never expected this.” Instead, you hear a lot of “there was something really strange and mean about him. He didn’t talk to anyone and wouldn’t look you in the eye.” So it seems like, although we’ll never know exactly why he did this, people that knew him seemed to be able to identify that if there was someone that was going to do something like this, he’d be a good candidate.
I started off with the definition of ambivalence because that’s the word that keeps coming back to me the more I think about it. Here was a guy who obviously had a lot of anger towards the social order of this country, particularly the clicks and structure inherent in the education system. It seemed like he wanted to make a statement about how the world had rejected him, so he wanted to do something to reject the world right back. He seemed particularly upset about “rich kids” who he seemed to think got an easy path through life and used that to either hold him down (and/or ignore him) or pursue meaningless diversions and excess. From that description, you can put him in the same category as Ted Kaczynski, who basically sought to rid the world of people he basically thought of as parasites. But there’s something really interesting about the way this guy chose to carry out this act that says a lot about him. Ted Kaczynski wanted to get his message across, but he also wanted to be anonymous. He didn’t want to get caught. This guy, on the other hand, went out of his way to make sure everybody knew who he was; sending photos and videos of himself to NBC a few days before the rampage. That’s what I find so interesting. Someone that hated “the system” so much made damn sure that he used “the system” to let everyone know who he was. It’s almost as if, after seemingly rejecting society his whole life, he ultimately felt the need to be validated by it, and this incredibly dysfunctional and destructive way was the only way he knew how. He was someone who was constantly screaming out for attention and then pushing away anyone that gave it to him. That’s ambivalence.
That’s why it was so disappointing to me that the news media seemed to play right into his hand by broadcasting the video footage and plastering images of him brandishing guns on the front page of newspapers. I have to think that is exactly what he was envisioning as he played it out in his head in the preceding days and months. The defense of the news media has been that it was news, and they have a duty to report it. I find that to be a cop-out and a far overly-simplistic view of the world. The news media censors out “news” all the time. After all, they didn’t feel the need to show close-ups of the victim’s bodies; nor do we get to see graphic depictions of soldiers cut down in the line of duty on a daily basis. I certainly am not arguing that the omission of these images is wrong; I’m just trying to point out the inequities here. It is my belief that you actually don’t need images at all to report “the news”. News should be an unbiased and indisputable record of the events that occurred (or at least as near to indisputable as you can get). Humans are visual learners and thus images are very valuable and should be used when they are appropriate. So if we agree that although it is not right to censor the reporting of a news item, it IS appropriate to censor (by omission) images associated with that news item, that turns the argument from the news media on its head. You can’t get away with simply saying, “this was part of the news story, so we reported it.” Instead, the charge to be addressed is “this was actually tangential to the story, and you chose to show it; why did you make that choice?”
I will have to admit a certain amount of personal bias here, as I currently have 2 brothers in undergrad and I myself currently attend classes 2 days per week. I make a point of all this, of course, because I am greatly concerned about copycat attempts. This country has long held a policy of not negotiating with terrorists, because we recognize that as soon as you do you open the floodgates to more, not less, terrorist activity. Well, I think we negotiated here, and our response is going to lead to more, not less, of this kind of destructive behavior. One of the pundits I watched over the last few weeks (might have been Bill Maher, but I don’t remember) made the point that when we are watching a baseball game on TV and a fan runs onto the field, they don’t show him because they know it would just encourage more fans to do it. I think it’s obvious to everyone that this is the correct course of action. Someone seeking attention in an inappropriate way should not be placated. But it seems that when the stakes get raised, we lose that perspective. It may seem an odd place for it, but this reminds me of a joke by the great comedian Eddie Izzard:
“You know, we think if somebody kills someone, that's murder, you go to prison. You kill 10 people, you go to Texas, they hit you with a brick, that's what they do. 20 people, you go to a hospital, they look through a small window at you forever. And over that, we can't deal with it, you know? Someone's killed 100,000 people, we're almost going, "Well done! You killed 100,000 people? You must get up very early in the morning. I can't even get down to the gym!”
Our current society is rife with examples of where just when one of our core principles should apply most, it seems to apply the least. You have a right to privacy . . . until the government worries you might be a security risk. You have a right to free speech . . .until you say something a lot of people don’t like. There is no draft . . . until we need one. I don’t want to belabor the point; and the preceding sentences could each be the subject of a 10 page essay themselves. I’m just saying that we seem to pretty much all agree on a lot of things on the micro level, but somehow it gets all cloudy when we get to the macro. That's also ambivalence.
Monday, April 16, 2007
A Couple of Reviews
About a week and a half ago, Christy and I went to see Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf at the Lasalle Bank Theatre. It was supposed to star Kathleen Turner but she was out that day so we got her stand-in instead. That was a tad disappointing, but considering that Kathleen Turner hasn’t really been a star since about 1992 it wasn’t the end of the world. I had never seen this play or the movie before, and I was initially a bit concerned when I found out there would be two intermissions and a total running time of 3 hours. In addition, everything takes place in one room and there are only 4 characters. So, basically, you’ve got 4 people talking in a living room for 3 hours. I make a point of that not as a knock on it, but rather so you can see that it is quite an accomplishment just that it was able to hold my attention the entire time. Actually, the first act was pretty slow and could have been pared down, but I found myself being surprised that we’d already reached the 2nd intermission and the final act flies by. I think the best way to describe it is that it’s a lot like War of the Roses minus the action and most of the comedy. To be sure, there’s plenty of stuff that’s funny in here, but it’s much more in the vein of “ok, wow, that’s about the worst thing a husband/wife could ever say to each other.” It’s even uncomfortable to watch at times, and that’s exactly what it’s designed to be. It’s tough to say that something like that is “enjoyable” to see, but at the very least you can appreciate the skill involved in crafting it. The other thing that makes the story extremely unique is that there really is no protagonist or indeed any character that’s likeable. The closest thing to it is the male lead, George. He definitely is the best written character and he delivers the perfect range whereby just as you reach the point where you’re starting to root for him he crosses the line and you start hating him again and then the cycle repeats. There’s also very little in the way of plot. Basically you are just thrown into the lives of these four people (two couples who are just getting to know each other) and over the course of the play you get a lot of background and insight into who these characters are, how they came to be here, and why they are capable of being so nasty to each other. You get something of a reveal in the 3rd act, but it’s one that doesn’t hit you right away and it’s only later on reflection that a lot of the significance sets in. The “big twist” is actually done pretty subtly; in fact you could tell by some of the discussions going on afterwards that some of the audience completely missed it. It’s just refreshing to see something contrary to the Hollywood mass films of today where they metaphorically beat your over the head with every minor plot point. Finally, it’s worth noting that this play was written over 40 years ago and, while I’m sure there have been some updates, overall it holds up remarkably well. All in all, for anyone that enjoys good dialogue and isn’t immediately revolted at the notion of sitting still in a theatre for 3 hours, you’ll find it well worth your time.
Next, last week I saw Children of Men, which was just released on DVD. All I can say is that there is A LOT to digest in this film. It’s one of those that exists on pretty much as many levels as you care to look at it on. On the surface, it is a futuristic sci-fi story where the human race has somehow lost the ability to procreate and all of a sudden after 18 years one woman has managed to become pregnant. The plot centers around how one man gets involved with this and is attempting to get the pregnant woman to some vaguely defined group of scientists referred to as “The Human Project.” Watched on this level, it’s pretty much your typical sci-fi chase film and could be classified as pretty forgettable. But, as I said, there’s a lot more going on beneath the surface. On another level, it is an examination on how different the world becomes without children in it. There’s a lot of morality in western culture that seems to be defined by “what message does it send to children?” and what happens when that’s no longer relevant? What happens to the collective human psyche when they’ve essentially been given a terminal illness? What’s the point of building towards a better tomorrow when there won’t be one? Then, on a whole separate level, it’s a movie that is not really taking place in the future at all. Even though the human race still obviously has the ability to give birth, much of the world does not value life. Individual groups cling to their own ideologies with such rigidity that the preservation of life becomes secondary to achieving their goal. There are a lot of characters that die during the film, and while all of them have some connection to the pregnant woman it is interesting to see which die in the spirit of self sacrifice and which ones die in pursuit of their own agenda. There’s a lot more that I can say about this film, but not without giving away too much of the plot (for those still planning on seeing it) or boring you to tears (for those who aren’t).
Lastly, but certainly not leastly, is Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theatres. If you have never heard of ATHF before, this review will make about as much sense as the movie (that is to say, none). For everyone else, I will just say that it was pretty much what I expected it to be. I regret that I ended up seeing this film sober; I certainly didn’t plan to but that’s just how it worked out. I went down to Champaign to visit my bros and they failed to inform me that it was Mom’s Weekend at U of I. Hence, when we bought the tickets and then tried to go out for dinner and drinks in the 90 minutes before the movie started we discovered that every restaurant in the area had a 2-hour wait except for a Chinese buffet that didn’t serve alcohol. And believe me, although I tried it is very difficult to catch a buzz off of Kung Pao chicken. In any case I still found the film to be pretty damn funny. It felt long, particularly in the middle, but that is to be expected when you take something usually seen in 12- minute increments and stretch it out to 85. I think it’s also probably the most narrowly targeted film I’ve ever seen released in a theatre. I mean, Family Guy has about 5 times the viewers and they still went straight to DVD with their movie. It’s pretty comical to read some of the reviews from critics who obviously went into the film knowing absolutely nothing about it. Given that, I’m actually surprised it’s gotten as good of reviews as it has (currently 47% positive according to rottentomatoes.com). I’ll definitely be giving this one another look when it hits DVD so I can view it again in the proper mindset.
And in other news, the Cubs are off to their trademark craptacular start. A 4-7 record to start the year means I now need them to go 88-63 the rest of the way to hit my prediction. I love that the pitching staff gives up a grand total of 1 run combined in two games this weekend and the Cubs still went 1-1 over those 2 games. And that on the heels of blowing a 5-0 lead in approximately 7 minutes on Friday afternoon. How long till football season start?
Marathon Update - Still doing pretty well, although I slacked last week and only ran twice (5 miles each time). Still mainly focusing on trying to drop some weight and run between 15-20 miles per week till we get to mid-June. I've also started walking to work again ~3 days per week (4 miles) patially for health reasons and partially to avoid the disaster that is the el construction . Looking to get back on my regular schedule of running on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday starting tonight/
Next, last week I saw Children of Men, which was just released on DVD. All I can say is that there is A LOT to digest in this film. It’s one of those that exists on pretty much as many levels as you care to look at it on. On the surface, it is a futuristic sci-fi story where the human race has somehow lost the ability to procreate and all of a sudden after 18 years one woman has managed to become pregnant. The plot centers around how one man gets involved with this and is attempting to get the pregnant woman to some vaguely defined group of scientists referred to as “The Human Project.” Watched on this level, it’s pretty much your typical sci-fi chase film and could be classified as pretty forgettable. But, as I said, there’s a lot more going on beneath the surface. On another level, it is an examination on how different the world becomes without children in it. There’s a lot of morality in western culture that seems to be defined by “what message does it send to children?” and what happens when that’s no longer relevant? What happens to the collective human psyche when they’ve essentially been given a terminal illness? What’s the point of building towards a better tomorrow when there won’t be one? Then, on a whole separate level, it’s a movie that is not really taking place in the future at all. Even though the human race still obviously has the ability to give birth, much of the world does not value life. Individual groups cling to their own ideologies with such rigidity that the preservation of life becomes secondary to achieving their goal. There are a lot of characters that die during the film, and while all of them have some connection to the pregnant woman it is interesting to see which die in the spirit of self sacrifice and which ones die in pursuit of their own agenda. There’s a lot more that I can say about this film, but not without giving away too much of the plot (for those still planning on seeing it) or boring you to tears (for those who aren’t).
Lastly, but certainly not leastly, is Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theatres. If you have never heard of ATHF before, this review will make about as much sense as the movie (that is to say, none). For everyone else, I will just say that it was pretty much what I expected it to be. I regret that I ended up seeing this film sober; I certainly didn’t plan to but that’s just how it worked out. I went down to Champaign to visit my bros and they failed to inform me that it was Mom’s Weekend at U of I. Hence, when we bought the tickets and then tried to go out for dinner and drinks in the 90 minutes before the movie started we discovered that every restaurant in the area had a 2-hour wait except for a Chinese buffet that didn’t serve alcohol. And believe me, although I tried it is very difficult to catch a buzz off of Kung Pao chicken. In any case I still found the film to be pretty damn funny. It felt long, particularly in the middle, but that is to be expected when you take something usually seen in 12- minute increments and stretch it out to 85. I think it’s also probably the most narrowly targeted film I’ve ever seen released in a theatre. I mean, Family Guy has about 5 times the viewers and they still went straight to DVD with their movie. It’s pretty comical to read some of the reviews from critics who obviously went into the film knowing absolutely nothing about it. Given that, I’m actually surprised it’s gotten as good of reviews as it has (currently 47% positive according to rottentomatoes.com). I’ll definitely be giving this one another look when it hits DVD so I can view it again in the proper mindset.
And in other news, the Cubs are off to their trademark craptacular start. A 4-7 record to start the year means I now need them to go 88-63 the rest of the way to hit my prediction. I love that the pitching staff gives up a grand total of 1 run combined in two games this weekend and the Cubs still went 1-1 over those 2 games. And that on the heels of blowing a 5-0 lead in approximately 7 minutes on Friday afternoon. How long till football season start?
Marathon Update - Still doing pretty well, although I slacked last week and only ran twice (5 miles each time). Still mainly focusing on trying to drop some weight and run between 15-20 miles per week till we get to mid-June. I've also started walking to work again ~3 days per week (4 miles) patially for health reasons and partially to avoid the disaster that is the el construction . Looking to get back on my regular schedule of running on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday starting tonight/
Friday, April 06, 2007
Has the World Gone Crazy? I'm Not Sure but the Invisible Pixie that Lives in my Sock Drawer Said It Has.
I'm not sure if it's the Earth's proximity to the sun or maybe some type of chemical imbalance in the air, but it seems like the world decides to up and go batshit crazy every once in a while. As proof of this, these are a sampling of the stories I've read about over the last 10 days:
Keith Richards admitted to mixing his late father's ashes with coke and snorting them. Then he said it was a joke. I'm honestly not sure which makes him more crazy: snorting his father or thinking that saying that he had would be funny. One thing's for sure; the jokes about Keith's absurd intake of drugs over the last 40 years aren't going away anytime soon. And have you seen a picture of him recently? If he looks like that on the outside, how does he still have functioning organs on the inside? (http://tinyurl.com/25fcvj)
This next story is about Michael Jackson, so I guess it's fair to say that I'm about 15 years too late to say he's "gone" crazy. However, this seems strange even for him. Apparently he is currently in negotiations to build a 50-foot tall robot replica of himself that will roam the Las Vegas desert and shoot laser beams. If built, it will supposedly be the first thing visitors see when they land in Vegas. Well, I guess that's one way to discourage minors from coming . . . (http://tinyurl.com/ypxe2q)
Karl Rove, calling himself MC Rove, rapped during a White House Broadcaster's dinner. I'd like to say more about this, but I'm speechless. (http://tinyurl.com/2kjnjy)
In a story that sounds like the beginning to a bad joke, a coyote walked into a Quizno's in the Chicago Loop and decided to just chill out and lie down in front of the soda machine. What's perhaps the most interesting thing about this story is not that a coyote traversed a number of city blocks in front of hundreds of people in the middle of the day and walked into a sandwich shop (did someone hold the door open for him or did he figure out how to do the revolving door?) but that he didn't eat anything. Um, aren't coyotes supposed to like meat? Doesn't this beg the question of what the hell is wrong with the meat at Quizno's?(http://tinyurl.com/2nekru)
And finally, at a fraternity house in Michigan a woman walked in, stripped down, and started masturbating and refused to leave for about a half hour. This may mark the first time in history that a fraternity has attempted to get a woman into her clothes and out of their house instead of the other way around. My favorite line in the story is this: "Fraternity members said they will throw out two couches in the living room because of the incident." You know you've done something wrong when you manage to disgust a fraternity. (http://tinyurl.com/36bdzh)
Keith Richards admitted to mixing his late father's ashes with coke and snorting them. Then he said it was a joke. I'm honestly not sure which makes him more crazy: snorting his father or thinking that saying that he had would be funny. One thing's for sure; the jokes about Keith's absurd intake of drugs over the last 40 years aren't going away anytime soon. And have you seen a picture of him recently? If he looks like that on the outside, how does he still have functioning organs on the inside? (http://tinyurl.com/25fcvj)
This next story is about Michael Jackson, so I guess it's fair to say that I'm about 15 years too late to say he's "gone" crazy. However, this seems strange even for him. Apparently he is currently in negotiations to build a 50-foot tall robot replica of himself that will roam the Las Vegas desert and shoot laser beams. If built, it will supposedly be the first thing visitors see when they land in Vegas. Well, I guess that's one way to discourage minors from coming . . . (http://tinyurl.com/ypxe2q)
Karl Rove, calling himself MC Rove, rapped during a White House Broadcaster's dinner. I'd like to say more about this, but I'm speechless. (http://tinyurl.com/2kjnjy)
In a story that sounds like the beginning to a bad joke, a coyote walked into a Quizno's in the Chicago Loop and decided to just chill out and lie down in front of the soda machine. What's perhaps the most interesting thing about this story is not that a coyote traversed a number of city blocks in front of hundreds of people in the middle of the day and walked into a sandwich shop (did someone hold the door open for him or did he figure out how to do the revolving door?) but that he didn't eat anything. Um, aren't coyotes supposed to like meat? Doesn't this beg the question of what the hell is wrong with the meat at Quizno's?(http://tinyurl.com/2nekru)
And finally, at a fraternity house in Michigan a woman walked in, stripped down, and started masturbating and refused to leave for about a half hour. This may mark the first time in history that a fraternity has attempted to get a woman into her clothes and out of their house instead of the other way around. My favorite line in the story is this: "Fraternity members said they will throw out two couches in the living room because of the incident." You know you've done something wrong when you manage to disgust a fraternity. (http://tinyurl.com/36bdzh)
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Tinkers to Evers, any Chance?
“Winter, slumbering in the open air, wears on its smiling face a dream . . . of spring”
- Phil Connors
Groundhog Day
Most years by about late-July (or sometimes, like last year, much earlier) you can hear Cubs fans across the country utter the now-famous cliché “What till next year!” It is simultaneously an expression of both utter despair (because the season is over) and of defiant hope (because there will be another season and another chance). So here we the Cub faithful find ourselves yet again; at the start of another season daring to once again wonder if next year is finally here, or if this will be just another chapter in the same season that has gone on for the last 98 years. As of right now, Carlos Zambrano appears to be the only one claiming to know the answer to that one (http://tinyurl.com/25dev3).
I have often described being a Cubs fan as an illness or a disability (and I know my wife would agree). I’m not sure how I got it, I don’t ever remember not having it, and I know I’ll never be rid of it. One of the unique aspects of being a Cubs fan is that when you meet someone and find out they are also a fan you can say “I’m sorry to hear that” and more times than not they will not find it an odd comment or take offense at all. That just goes with the territory when your team has a bad century. You can also walk into Wrigley Field and almost immediately divide the crowd into one of the following 5 groups:
The Optimist – This person firmly believes before the start of every year that the Cubs are definitely winning the World Series this year. There is no doubt in their mind and they will probably accuse any fan who is not as optimistic as them as “not being a real fan.” When they are at a game, they will always be convinced that the Cubs will win today, even if they are behind 15-0 in the bottom of the ninth inning with 2 outs and Neifi Perez is batting with a broken arm and his shoelaces tied together against a 2003-version of Eric Gagne.
The Pessimist – This person is essentially a masochist. They expect horrible things to happen at any and all times and thus can never really enjoy the good moments because they are constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. Yet they still will get very angry when misfortune does strike. Often, this is someone who used to be “The Optimist” until one day they just snapped.
The “Cubs Games Are Fun” Fan – The fact that there is a baseball game going on is incidental to these people. They have essentially paid a $20 - $50 cover charge to hang out, drink beer, and/or talk on their cell phone during the game. They are easily spotted when they give themselves away by cheering loudly during routine fly balls or occasionally cheering for the wrong team. About the only thing The Optimist and The Pessimist can agree on is that this type of fan is ruining the Cubs.
Sox Fans – Why do they come to Wrigley? Who knows, but they do. For some extremely strange reason there is a large contingent of Sox fans that follow the Cubs more closely than they do their own team, just so that they have the pleasure of rubbing it into the face of each and every Cub fan they see whenever something bad happens to the Cubs. Let me be clear that I am not generalizing about Sox fans here; just the ones that come to Wrigley (and not during the annual Cubs-Sox series). I’m talking about the Sox fans who, 5 minutes after their team won the World Series, decided that the best way to celebrate was to go onto various Cubs forums and message boards and rub it in. I don’t know why we are so important to them, but apparently we are.
The Die-Hard – This person knows the whole Cubs active roster, knows how they did yesterday, what time they play today, and who the starting pitchers are. At almost all times during the year could guess the batting average of almost every Cubs player within 20-30 points. Probably also knows what stats like VORP and PECOTA mean as well. Because they know so much about the team, they tend to be the most realistic of all the fans. They do not expect a career .200 hitter to suddenly hit .300 like the Optimist, nor do they expect the Cubs starting pitcher’s arm to fall off at any given moment like the Pessimist. It should be noted here that the Pessimists and Sox fans have scored decisive victories in recent years in the cases of Kerry Wood and Mark Prior.
As you probably have guessed I see myself as part of the last category, although at various times I have dipped in the other ones as well (except for the Sox fan). Most years I start out a little more optimistic than is usually warranted, and by August I’m convinced they’ll never win another game, and if I have any tickets remaining in those years I’m likely to go to the game and not care too much about it. But I try to stay on a pretty even keel. While the season is still competitive I’ll be pissed for about an hour after they lose a game, more if they lose in a particularly nasty way. And on days when they win, no matter what else bad happens to me that day I know I will go to bed that night thinking “at least the Cubs won today.”
In any case, with that as a backdrop I present my preview of the 2007 Cubs:
Starting rotation:
Carlos Zambrano (R)
Ted Lilly (L)
Jason Marquis (R)
Rich Hill (L)
Wade Miller (R)
For the first year in the last 5, the Cubs go into a season without expecting the names Wood or Prior to appear here. Which is good, considering they are once again hurt and/or pitching terribly. Big Z is obviously the ace and anchor of the rotation, and the Cubs can’t hope to make any kind of playoff push unless he wins around 18 games and has a sub-3.50 ERA. I think this is the year he finally turns the corner and becomes one of the games elite pitchers.
Honestly, overall I’m pretty happy with 4/5 of this group with Jason Marquis and his ridiculously high ERA and even more ridiculously priced contract being the lone exception. I especially don’t see him as a #3 starter, but after a couple turns through the rotation it shouldn’t really matter. The thing that really bothers me about his contract is that he will be given a longer leash than he deserves because no one wants $7 million per year rotting away at AAA. Supposedly the Cubs pursued him because they spotted a flaw in his delivery that they believe they have now corrected, but from what I’ve seen so far this spring he looks like the same old pitcher I’ve seen before. I’m thinking he will end up with 4-5 really good games, 4-5 really horrible games, and about 15-20 games where he does something like give up 4-5 runs in 5-6 innings. He may end up with around a .500 record if he gets bailed out enough by the Cubs offense.
But enough bitching. The guy to get really excited about in this list is Rich Hill. If you didn’t watch the Cubs past June last year (and there really wasn’t much reason to) you would be forgiven for not understanding what reason there is to be excited about him. After all, a combined 6-7 record with a 4.17 ERA doesn’t exactly scream “excitement.” But the key is to look at the story behind the numbers. Hill is still a pretty young guy (just turned 27 this month) and last year was his first real season in the majors. His inexperience really showed early as he compiled an 0-4 record with a 9.31 ERA in his first 4 starts before being sent down to Iowa. About the only memorable thing he did in the early part of the year was get himself blasted by Ozzie for criticizing Pierzynski after his brief impromptu boxing match with Michael Barrett. But after Hill got sent down he got really focused and started kicking ass at Iowa and just kept doing it once he made it back up again, this time going 6-3 with a 2.93 ERA in his final 12 starts. There always seems to be a big leap for young pitchers when they first get called up. They seem to be too excited about finally “making it” (not that I blame them) and aren’t able to execute the little things that got them there in the first place. It seems that it takes them experiencing failure (many for the first time in their lives) before they get that chip on their shoulder and want to prove to themselves and everyone else that they belong here. I look at Hill now and I can’t help but think about Zambrano. I was at the double-header in 2001 when Z made his major league debut. He got shelled. 2002 was his first “real” season in the big leagues and he was very hit and miss with a 4-8 record and a 3.66 ERA but showed off a lot of his potential. By 2003, it was obvious that he was a major league pitcher as he went 13-11 with a 3.11 ERA and helped the Cubs reach the playoffs. I see the same kind of thing for Hill in this his second “real” year. I project him to be around the 13 win mark with an ERA in the mid to high 3s. 15 wins is a stretch but is not out of the question.
Just a couple quick thoughts on the other two starters. For me the jury is still out on Lilly. I’m hoping he experiences the same success that other starters have experienced in moving from the AL to NL but only time will tell. He has the potential to work out extremely well or to be a complete disaster. And finally the best word for Miller is “serviceable”. Provided his injury woes are behind him, he should take the hill every 5th day and keep the Cubs in the game through the first 5 innings, which is exactly what you want out of your #5 starter.
Bullpen –
Bob Howry (R)
Ryan Dempster (R)
Michael Wuertz (R)
Angel Guzman (R)
Scott Eyre (L)
Will Ohman (L)
Neil Cotts (L)
Not much to say here, since little has changed since last year. That’s actually a good thing since for once the Cubs had one of the better bullpens in the league. That doesn’t include the closer role, as Dempster had an awful year (9 blown saves in 33 opportunities, 1-9 with a 4.80 ERA). While I don’t excuse his performance, it certainly wasn’t helped by the fact that the Cubs were able to get him opportunities maybe once or twice a week at most. Howry, Wuertz, Eyre, and Ohman all had solid years last year and I expect them to do so again. New addition Neil Cotts I have not at all been impressed with; he was outstanding for the Sox in 2005 and absolutely abysmal for them last year. So far he looks more like last year’s version, but given that the Cubs have 2 other solid lefties to turn to it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. The other addition is one-time uber prospect Angel Guzman, who is still projected to be an eventual major league starter. He will fill the long relief role to start the year and will probably also be the first to step into the rotation should anyone go down (and since this is the Cubs, you know someone will. Damn, there’s the Pessimist in me coming out).
One final note is that the astute of you may have noticed the lack of mention of Kerry Wood in the above. As of yesterday he will officially begin the year on the DL (surprise, surprise) and no one knows when he will possibly be ready to pitch in the majors again. As far as I’m concerned, he doesn’t exist for the Cubs right now. If he ever gets over his plethora of arm issues and comes back looking anything like his former self, that would be fantastic. But at this point I’ve got to view the odds of that happening as being only slightly higher than Illinois getting into a BCS bowl game next year. Anyone want to buy a used Kerry Wood jersey?
Infield –
Michael Barrett (C)
Derek Lee (1B)
Mark DeRosa (2B)
Cesar Izturis (SS)
Aramis Ramirez (3B)
I can’t possibly express how ecstatic I am that the name “Neifi Perez” no longer appears in the above list. Addition by subtraction if ever there was a case. I actually won’t say much about Derek Lee and Aramis Ramirez. Good years from them are expected and will be absolutely essential for the Cubs to have any form of success. Lee’s looked great so far this spring and shows no lingering ill effects from his wrist injury last year. Michael Barrett is as solid as they come as a catcher from an offensive standpoint, provided he has also recovered from his injury (if you don’t remember what his injury was, click here and prepare to wince http://tinyurl.com/yryr57). Last year mid-season addition Cesar Izturis will be the man at SS this year. He is generally light hitting but a gold glove caliber defender. As long as he hits in the 8-hole and gets his career average (.259) I’ll take it.
That leaves the only bona fide newcomer of the group in Mark Derosa, and he is the x-factor. The Cubs signed him to a larger-than-expected contract (a trend they continued throughout the off-season) to be the starting second baseman. He has generally been a part-time utility player for most of his career before having a very nice year with Texas last year. The question is whether the player the Cubs got is going to be who he was last year (AVG/OBP/SLG of .296/.357/.456) or the player he has been over the course of his career (.273/.331/.404). The former will make it a decent deal for the Cubs; the latter will make it close to a disaster. The good news is that he just turned 32 last month, so he should still be in his prime. I think he will end up closer to last year’s numbers than his career ones, and it will turn out that the Cubs overpaid for an average to slightly above-average player. Considering the Cubs past history of horrid contracts ($24 million for Todd Hundley comes to mind) that would actually be a pretty good outcome.
Outfield –
Alfonso Soriano (CF)
Jacque Jones (RF)
Matt Murton (LF)
Cliff Floyd (LF)
And now we come to the $136 million dollar man, Alfonso Soriano. Will he be worth that obscene amount of money? Hell no! Because no one is worth that money! In the best case scenario the Cubs will get 3-4 good years out of him and then manage to trade him to some team that’s desperate at the trade deadline. Worst case scenario is he becomes mired in mediocrity from the get-go and thus becomes untradeable and an albatross on the Cubs payroll for the next decade. Regardless of the long-term implications, it certainly is exciting to have a player of his caliber on this year’s team, even if the Cubs are forcing him to learn his 2nd new position in as many years.
In almost every way, Soriano is the opposite of last year’s CF Juan Pierre. Pierre hits mainly singles (only 47 of his 204 hits were for extra bases last year), hardly ever strikes out, plays gold-glove caliber defense, and homers about as often as we in the northern hemisphere witness a lunar eclipse (12 total HRs in his career, which dates back to 2000). Soriano, on the other hand, has half of his hits go for extra bases (89 out of 179 last year), will strike out quite frequently as well as butcher balls in CF, but also has averaged 35 HRs per year over the last 5 years (and hit 46 last year). For similarities, both are leadoff hitters with good speed (Soriano had 41 SBs last year; Pierre had 58).
I want to make it clear that overall I am much happier with the composition of the OF this year versus last, with one caveat. This defense is going to be terrifyingly bad to start the year; especially on days when Cliff Floyd starts over Murton. I don’t blame Soriano for struggling in the field. He only has one year of OF under his belt and is already being asked to switch positions. With his speed I think he will eventually turn into a solid if not spectacular CF but there will most definitely be growing pains that will cause great wailing and gnashing of teeth amongst the Wrigley faithful.
Cliff Floyd, on the other hand, really is a first class butcher in the outfield. There have been questions (and almost certainly there will be more over the next couple months) about why Floyd chose the Cubs (and vice versa) when at this point in his career he is clearly better suited to DH in the AL, but that’s irrelevant right now. To be sure, Floyd can most definitely still hit, and it is my hope that we will see him mainly in a PH role this year, but that will probably be determined by 1) his health (he had surgery on his heel in the off-season) and 2) how Murton plays.
Speaking of Murton, he himself is no wizard in the field but is not all that much of a liability either and I am excited about him this year. He was one of the few bright spots for the Cubs last season, finishing with a .297 average and .365 OBP. While the knock on him was his lack of power (only 13 HRs from a left fielder, which is typically a power position), he actually improved on that quite a bit in the second half of the year (.379 SLG prior to the All Star break, .522 afterwards). If Murton gets the majority of the playing time, I think he can hit .280 this year with over 20 HRs, and I have no problem with that. That just leaves Jacque Jones, and there’s not much to say about him. You pretty much know what you’re getting: a guy with power who strikes out a lot. He actually had a very nice year last year and, although I was one of those that severely criticized Hendry for signing him, I really think he got a raw deal from Cubs fans and deserved better. I hope he gets it this year. All in all, this is a very solid OF offensively, and a very bad OF defensively. All we can hope is that they hit in more than they let in, as they say.
Bench
Daryle Ward
Ronny Cedeno
Henry Blanco
Ryan Theriot
Murton or Floyd (whoever doesn’t start)
I actually am quite pleased with the Cubs bench this season, even if it does contain two players (Ward and Floyd) who are next to worthless in the field. Ward was an underrated pickup for the Cubs this year. He is a niche player that has stuck around in the majors by developing into a PH specialist. In 62 Abs last year as a PH, he hit .355 with a .674 SLG. That’s a real good option to bring in off the bench in clutch situations late in the game. Ryan Theriot will play the role of the super-sub this year, and I’m pretty excited about him too. I don’t think he will ever become a starter in the majors, but I see him having a long career anyway due to his speed and versatility as long as he can keep the average up. Cedeno was a big disappointment last year as the starting SS, and now he sees himself relegated to the bench behind Izturis. Having to fight for a roster spot this spring really seems to have lit a fire under him, and he seems to have turned a corner. He’s already walked 11 times this spring (in 55 Abs) after only walking 17 times during the entire season last year (in 524 ABs). And the fact that his spring average is .327 (versus the .245 he hit last year) means that he’s not just being more patient, he’s seeing the ball better. As always though, spring training is one thing, and he’s gonna have to prove it during the season. Still, having him waiting in the wings should push Izturis, and that can only help the Cubs. Henry Blanco (aka Hank White) is the Cubs backup catcher. There, that fulfills my obligation to say something about him.
Manager
Lou Piniella
Many would say that the removal of Dusty Baker was the best move the Cubs made in the off-season, and I wouldn’t necessarily disagree. I think that in general the effect a manager has on his team, while important, is vastly overrated by fans. Still, it has been truly refreshing this spring to not have to worry about cringing at the truly ignorant things that would come out of Dusty Baker’s mouth (example “Walks help. They do help. But you aren't going to walk across the plate, you're going to hit across the plate.”). By all accounts, Big Lou has run a solid spring camp and it is probably the most positive camp the Cubs have had in the last 3-4 years. Lou also got me even more optimistic about him when he just announced the opening day starting lineup and has Murton hitting 2nd (and Izturis 8th). I also really look forward to seeing him kick dirt on the umpires and get tossed from a few games. I know that’s not always productive, but I figure since Cubs fans are so passionate we ought to have a manager who’s passionate as well. Overall, I don’t think Lou is the savior, but I also think he is a great improvement over his predecessor and I am optimistic that I won’t have to witness bizarre late inning substitutions (i.e. double-switching for no reason aka the Dusty Baker special) or just flat out bringing in the wrong pitcher in a given situation. I just hope Lou is enjoying his honeymoon period, because as Jacque Jones and Dusty Baker can tell you, this town can turn on you in a hurry.
Final Thoughts
So with all that being said, how is this going to translate into Ws and Ls? Well, your guess is as good as mine (though I like to think mine’s better). The Optimist in me says that the Cubs have all the pieces in place to make a charge for the division and a deep run in the playoffs. The Pessimist in me says that the starting rotation is lackluster at best and the OF may set a new record for errors. Then there is another part of me that is so sick to death of this Chicago winter that I am just looking forward to drinking beer in the sun at Wrigley. So what does the Die-Hard fan in me say? Well, he says that there is a case to be made that the Cubs will win 90, and a case to be made that they will lose 90. So where does that leave me? Eh, what the hell; I’m feeling optimistic today.
The Cubs will win 92 games, then end 98 years of futility, the billygoat curse, and the memories of Durham and Bartman by marching through the playoffs and capturing the World Series.
(Are you really surprised?)
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